Sunday, January 15, 2006


i am in a fog this morning...... i know it is Sunday.. and i know that Saturday was yesterday and i know that a whole mess of things happened yesterday.. cause .. OH MY GOD !! i have the bruises/marks to prove it........

For those of you who are still wondering if the toothpick challenge happened and didn't think to take a peak at Sir's site.... yeah it happened.......... without the results Sir had hoped for.. no 103+ ... the few i took were more than enough .. thank you very much Cloud !!!

In the afternoon Sir took me downstairs for a session.... and i was a little bit devilish.. (what else is new right??!!) And at one point i made a comment that Sir was STILL G.O.S. (good old Sir) ....... now i guess that it is ok for Him to be GOS with everyone else.. but NOT with me.. i know it is something He has been trying to NOT to be with me.. and my words flicked a switch......... He picked up a wooden paddle i gave Him years ago......... and one which has almost never been used on me for a number of reasons... and i HATE it.. i HATE it with a passion.. it looks wimpy.. it is light weight and i am sorry it looks plain wimpy!!! This wimpy paddle soon had me sobbing and begging for Sir to slow down.. to .. to.. i don't know what .. i almost said "stop" i have NEVER said "stop"

Before i knew it Sir was moving up and down the wall of toys using each one on my ass and back.. i remember at one point shrieking at Him that He was hitting too high.. or it was wrapping.. and i remember hearing Him answer me.. "every single inch of your body is MINE.. I can hit what I want.. " And He is right... i gave Him that right ...

i can't begin to find the words to even come close to describing what a blubbering mess i was ..... during the hour i was on the cross.. i alternately HATED Sir and loved Him.. i alternately was a masochist.. was NOT a masochist.. i alternately wanted it all to stop and wanted it to continue...

And it didn't stop........... oh there was a break for dinner... BUT Sir brought that wimpy paddle upstairs and in the evening He went to work on my ass again.. deliberating hitting the bruises that were beginning to appear.. and i was howling and crying and blubbering.. and begging...

And i am left to ponder two things.. 1) has the GOS really disappeared in my Sir?? and 2) did Mr Mat act like a meat tenderizing mallet .. and prepared my tough ass nicely for the paddling/whipping it got.. and that is why i have bruises/marks today?? oh yeah.. i do have one other serious question 3) has anyone else experienced extreme sleepiness after a major endophin session???


  1. Oh, yes, that would be me! Every session pretty much, within an hour I'm dozing off. Coffee puts me to sleep too. Weird huh?

    My theory is that we're so accustomed to having to be strong, that we never really let ourselves go completely, and the mental exertion to maintain that thin line between completely giving in to the pain and holding yourself just far enough out of its reach to remain whole, is exhausting.

  2. I do too...often... but at other moments, it awakes me completly and feeling so hungry!!
    The last time it happen, I was crying for pizza... 3 minutes of that and I felt asleep until morning...;-)

  3. i do as well, sometimes even after a light session...i agree with taylor - when you 'let go' then i think you just crash.

    Sounds like a wonderful weekend, by the way!

  4. Of course it happens!!!!!! Master sometimes thinks i'm dead and not simply sleeping. That, when He awakes me, He tells me: "Can you do anything else apart from fucking, crying and sleeping?" ^____^
    PS: the toothpick challenge really scares me!!!!

  5. Yep, definitely what taylor said. I think it's totally normal to need to crash after your body and mind has taken so much.

    It sounds like you got your Sir back - and just the way you like him. Good for both of you! :)


Popular Posts