Note Worthy!

 

 Over the last year I have noticed some minor changes in the lil one's body....
It started with a couple of pimples on her face.... I pointed them out to her and suggested she start washing properly with soap and water.  (cause we all know kids tend to slap some water on their face - run their hands under the tap and call it done!)

Then I noticed - occasionally - that she seemed to have some 'budding' happening in the breast area.......... though it was minor and not that easy to spot..... I wondered.

Then I noticed this spring that she seemed to have grown a foot!  mainly cause the seat on her bike needs to be raised..... the legs are much longer and the body shape is changing.

I decided Sir Steve and I needed to talk...... at first he had that look Dads get when they think their daughters may actually be growing up..... then he agreed .. and we agreed it was probably time to start having THE talk.   BUT I wasn't so sure I wanted to be part of this......... I (silly me!) actually thought the mother might want to have THE talk.  BUT because of a number of things.... Sir Steve said he would rather this learning be initiated here........so the teacher in me suggested we find a book.. .an age appropriate book.  (Amazon is my friend!)

The book we ordered is "Celebrate Your Body" - a body positive book

It arrived over the weekend and Sir Steve and I took a look at it.  We were both really impressed with the chapters and the philosophy behind it.

Yesterday when the lil one finished school - Sir Steve brought out the book to show her.  I was expecting shyness... push back.. anything but what she displayed......... EXCITEMENT!!  

So yup - she's ready to start having THE talk :)  We read the first chapter together... I wanted to take a back seat in this discussion - cause ya know - not the mother mentality... BUT as fate would have it - the garage called for Sir Steve to pick up his car mid way through the first chapter.  He left and I sat down and finished the first chapter with her.

I was so impressed with the way the book tackled the subject of puberty... straight talk - proper terms.. stressing how one should never compare their "puberty journey" to anyone else........ and for me the best part was when they said 'notice how we don't use the term beautiful? or pretty? cause what's on the outside of your body is not important - it's what's on the inside - kindness and love and caring - that's what's important!

Towards the end of the chapter they suggest that 'you find a trusted adult - someone you can talk to'.  I stopped the reading and asked the lil one "who could be your trusted adult?" She immediately answered "Daddy and you".  (pat answer right?) So I said 'what about another trusted adult - someone else?" and she hummed and hawed and finally mumbled "maybe grandma" (mother's mother) the words just kinda hung there for a minute - I was wondering if she would add "mommy" but the next words surprised me...... She blurted out "but I would really rather just have you and daddy".  I brought up mommy and she just shook her head and said "nope".  So we settled on Daddy and S would be her trusted adults.

Later as I was preparing dinner I was feeling warm and fuzzy...... the lil one labelled us as 'trusted adults'..... HER trusted adults........ it felt pretty good ya know?  affirmation that we're not so bad as parents - that *I'm* not so bad as the wicked stepmom.

Life is good when your role is validated :)

Best for Last?

 

 

 So ronnie's question is last........ best for last? or last because it's a tough question...

What's your favourite part of TTWD

Do I have a favourite part???  There's really no service in our TTWD - well no service that Sir Steve expects.... I do the cooking cleaning laundry child rearing - which I suppose is a service - but is it TTWD or done from a position of love?

We have no rituals per say......... we have no rules.... 

WHOA - hang on... rituals -- maybe?? rules -- maybe??

Sir Steve likes me to sleep naked - every single night.
Sir Steve likes me on my right side snuggled into him so he can grab and hold my breast as we fall asleep.
OH and I almost forgot - he likes me clean shaven.......

Definitely rituals and  rules....... but ya know I wonder if I just refused to do them would it matter to Sir Steve?? Would he do anything to enforce them?  I'm thinking NO... so then are they rituals/rules?? I think maybe it would be reassuring if Sir Steve voiced the importance of these to him...... no consequences if I refuse .. cause ya know I'm an adult and shouldn't need consequences... BUT some sort of affirmation.  AND as for the shaving - well it would be kinda nice if he noticed I did it ...... like checking every Friday for example.  BUT he isn't big on schedules.... so no checking.  Some weeks I wonder why I do it - ya know?!

Ahhhh wellllll...it is what it is.

SO is there anything I do like TTWD wise?

yup - pain...... any pain.. lots of pain... fill me up pain... recharge me pain. Pain makes me feel bonded to him.. makes me feel loved.

AND that's it for questions - if anyone has a last minute question - ask away.... you still have a couple of days.

Exciting Weekend?

 

 

We had a quiet-ish weekend planned.......... a quick run to Quebec Saturday morning to pick up cigarettes and then at home vegging......... (with me hoping for some fun adult time)

It all started off according to plan - Sir Steve even suggested before we hit the highway that we pop into a new pastry shop and pick up a couple of fresh cinnamon buns for breakfast on Sunday.  BUT as we got on the highway to head home from Quebec the car started vibrating.. and warning lights started flashing on the dash.  

Immediately my panic button activated.   Sir Steve had me pull the owner's manual out of the glove box and check out the warning lights...... yup the car definitely needed to go to the garage..... BUT we were an hour from home!! Sir Steve opted for trying to limp home.  As soon as we could we got off the highway and took the old 2 lane highway the rest of the way.  I did not breath until we pulled into our driveway.

The car is home and I am guessing Monday it will be going into the shop..... le sigh.. more unplanned expense - colour me sad.

Thanks to that lil 'adventure' the weekend was very quiet......... and no fun adult time.  Ahhhh well - there's always next weekend right?? 

Your Turn

 I have been answering all the questions you folks have posed to me ...
BUT it's Sunday and time for Sunday Sentiments... I thought it was time to turn the tables a little bit and get you all to answer the following -- based on my blog "Words of Wisdom" 

 What words of wisdom do you have???

 

"Toys"

Another March question......... Baker asked:

 I'm curious what types of implements you dislike the most? Or maybe ones you've never tried, but would like to?

It's been a few years since I talked about 'toys' ... what I love and what I love to hate...
I'd say the only toy I don't like and don't miss if Sir Steve doesn't use it - is the wooden paddle.  

 

It's funny - he asked me last weekend where my large wooden paddle was...... I've been thinking about it this week - and am not sure.. I may have left it behind when I moved ... Or it's packed at the bottom of my toy bag...... have I looked for it?? nope -- (cheeky grin) am gonna say I was too busy this week to search ........ maybe next week??
I don't like wooden paddles since I lost so much weight.  My ass used to be nicely padded before... now - not so much... so the wooden paddles bruise the bones in my ass  -- and not a fun bruising....though Sir Steve pointed out that ANY toy can be used in such a way as to not cause serious bruising....... so maybe? I will have a go at finding the BIG wooden paddle.

Baker - IF there was something / some toy I wanted to try - I have done it by now.  Let me give you some examples.....

OH and for those of you who may be a little squeamish - you might want to leave now and come back tomorrow 

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 Remember this week I was talking about Tess from Under his hand - well she posted pics of a tack bra she had made......... remember the competition we had going? well my dom at the time told me to get instructions from her to make myself one...

They look worse than they are actually.......... not once did they actually break the skin.. not even from 'bear hugs' as Sir Steve so kindly reminded me this morning... 

from tack bra it's not too far a leap to needle play...... I LOVED needle play - unfortunately needles make Sir Steve squeamish (grinning) ...... 

 

BUT  once you got past the first few pricks - I always found it calming / soothing.  yeah yeah I know I'm weird!!

Along the same lines - that is calming and soothing - there is mummification.

 

I have experienced it more than a few times....... truthfully I found it boring... there wasn't enough in it to satisfy the masochist in me .

I have tried......... electro play.......

and some fire play

 

BUT there comes a point when you realize you are 'playing with fire' (pun intended) and step back to safer forms of play...... 

I think the extreme forms of play were a kind of 'frenzy' for me ... a wanting to try everything.. to push the limits... and if you're lucky enough to come through it with no major damage you wake up and realize it was just a momentary desire to shock ... or thrill.

OR ... I am just an old subbie retired to the rocking chair - playing it safe without any undo stress to an old body.

Prettiest Place

 

Still working on the questions from March - Prefectdt asked:

 Where is the prettiest place that you have ever visited in Canada? Or if you prefer something darker. Where is the nicest place in Canada that you have done something kinky in and what did you do? 

 

When I was younger (much younger) my father insisted that we see our country before we visited any other country.  So I was lucky enough to travel across Canada from the East Coast to the West Coast.  (not at one time ....... but over a few summers)  But when I came to write this I couldn't decide what part of Canada was the prettiest... every province has pretty spots... 

from the red sand beaches of PEI

 

to the Rockies and my favourite Lake Louise

 

to the west coast and Victoria BC 

 I have been struggling with the prettiest spot....... but in my heart of hearts I have to say it's Montreal.  It's difficult to explain the draw for me - other than the fact this is where I was born and lived most of my life ....... it's a big modern city

but in the center of Montreal down by the St Lawrence river is 'old Montreal' and the history just enthralls me.... the old stone houses/stores and the cobblestone streets

and tourists to Montreal are always fascinated with the outside staircases........ no other place in Canada has the outside twisty staircases............

 

(whispering) and there were old Victorian houses that contained BDSM play spaces... dungeons.. private /semi private clubs

 

 where folks would gather on Friday and Saturday evenings .... sharing the experience of whips and chains and floggers oh my!  It was at clubs like the one above that I learned about needle play and electric play .... where I watched extreme play ... was caged... where a bond between submissives were formed - where the french BDSM community and the English BDSM community came together to share.

Prefectdt - this has to be the most difficult question I was asked this month - thank you for the challenge and I hope I answered your question fully.

Words of Wisdom?

 

 Continuing with March's question and answers.......

Enzo asked...........
  Are there any words of wisdom that you have learned about the lifestyle that you have would like to share with fellow bloggers and readers?

 in my mind this question follows nicely from yesterday's blog ..... so here I go...... 

WHY! oh my god!  WHY would anyone ask me for wisdom!!!  I look back on my life and I want to run and hide.  All those times I was SURE -- no more than sure -- I was positive I knew what I wanted - how to get it - and how things should work !!

I was the BEST submissive - until I wasn't.

I was the BEST slave - until I wasn't.

I tried poly - until I didn't.

and Enzo wants my words of wisdom?? (grinning)  How about 'don't do what I did' !!
 

Ok seriously ... my words of wisdom......

* that the internet is a land of smoke and mirrors

* that the people who claim to be experts usually aren't.

* that 'newbie frenzy' is A thing

* that acceptance is not always easy

* that safe words are a false sense of security

* that we all make stupid mistakes (and it's ok)

* that the one and only person you have to answer to ...... is........... yourself.

* that you should be happy and if you aren't it's time to change

* that change is hard and often times painful.......... 

AND finally.....

* don't compare what you have (or want) to anyone else's relationship... each relationship should be custom fit.

AND
NO ONE RELATIONSHIP IS THE 'RIGHT WAY' !

Blogging

 

 

Continuing with March questions......... 

Willie asked:

I have a question for March- You said on Windy's blog that you didn't start blogging to make friends. What was it that had you drawn to blogging? Has your purpose for blogging changed over the years?

 
This question really made me stop and think...... and made me look honestly at my blogging...... 

If you take a peak over on the right side - my list of blog entries by year - you'll see I started blogging back in 2005.  I don't remember how I found BDSM blogs on line - BUT I do remember which ones I first read - "Under his hand" (remember Tess?) .. and then there was the "Heron Clan" (remember swan and Tom and their poly relationship?) and there was Lisa's blog - for the life of me I can't remember what her original blog was - but her current one is Purple Alligator.   I read them every single day -- watched for them and fussed if they didn't post.  Blogging didn't seem so strange to me - the one who received her first diary at the age of 10 and in the following years filled notebooks with daily entries.  

What was strange and new to me was writing on line and having anyone come and read it... wasn't sure I liked that idea.  BUT I could write about BDSM - my "journey" into the community - and self discovery.  I was in a D/s relationship at the time and asked and was given permission to start my blog.  Originally I only wrote about BDSM - spankings and service and toys and pain and clubs ......... I corresponded with Tess and swan and lisa... I never thought of it as forming friendships.. but I guess in a lot of ways I was........  There was a humorous episode that involved toothpicks and ass cracks and Tess and her Master and my Dom and I became embroiled in.  We thought it was just between us...... it was more joke than anything else -- but then it turned out that folks from all over had read about it (either on her blog or on mine) and the challenge started going around the states and one or two countries in Europe.  BOY did we have a good laugh!!  (but it also showed me how folks interpret what they read on line)

Those first few years The Journey was only about BDSM - there was little talk about real life ........... until I got sick... very sick ... and my then Sir reported on here about my health......  I used to really struggle about writing about something other than BDSM on here... but the truth of the matter is......... life is about more than BDSM... and if this was going to be an authentic telling of my life then it had to be about all facets of life.   For a while there was NO BDSM in my life and I didn't know if there ever would be again.  My readers came and commented - they encouraged me to write... about anything and everything.......... and so I did........ and now truthfully The Continued Journey is about life... with all it's warts and joys... 

I like to think my purpose in blogging has changed vastly....... I used to think I knew so much about BDSM -- after all - back in the day I was very involved in the local community and in communities across the border.  I ran a submissive group in real life ... I went to 'conventions' .... and then when I was with the 'two Sirs" I often participated in demos.

I was asked just recently about the visitors to my blog.... and I answered honestly that I didn't know where they came from and that I honestly didn't care.  IF people come and read - they come and read.  If they don't ... shrug.. they don't.  I honestly write what pops into my head on any day.  The hardest thing about writing is folks misunderstanding what I write........ eg - I'll write something tongue in cheek and folks take it very seriously.  (even IF I announce it is a tongue in cheek entry)  BUT I am learning to 'just let it go"

Now i think i have handled your question willie - if there's something I missed just let me know :)

Small Step Forward

 

 How many of you have 'date nights'?  OR I should say - used to have date nights??
I loved them!  Sir Steve would pick one weekend a month and we'd have a date night - usually dinner at a restaurant and a movie - or a play.  It was wonderful - something to look forward to - especially during the winter months.  

BUT date nights came to a screaming halt a year ago.  OH we tried to replicate them at home.. ordered in dinners... movie on Netflix - but it just wasn't the same ya know??

This weekend the stars aligned.........
First it was sunny and reasonably warm (like 59 degrees F - or 15 C) ...
Second our favourite food truck opened .........
We decided to drive over and get dinner on Saturday night........ BUT ... I asked Sir Steve if maybe we could ... possibly... eat there too!!??? The caveat was - it couldn't be busy/crowded.

This food truck has 'gourmet' fast food - for example - a Greek burger or Bacon Mac and cheese poutine (poutine is french fries covered in gravy and cheese curds) or Naan wraps like Pulled Pork Naan. AND the portions are HUGE (yes Fondles HUGE - grinning - we do like HUGE around here LOL)

The stars were truly aligned !!  The truck was busy - BUT no one was eating there (probably cause the tables were in the shade and it was a tad chilly)....that didn't deter us... we ordered - took the first table and 'chowed' down.  It was the BEST!! not just the food - BUT the eating out - literally and figuratively

This was the food truck............. 

 

the cutlery is stored in containers that dispense one at a time - tucked under the hood

 

and picnic tables...... for your dining pleasure. (socially distanced)

 

This might have been one of the best date nights EVER!

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Question Period...... 

As it would happen PK asked a question that sorta goes with today's post...... 

"Have you always lived in the great white north? Ever tried anything warmer? Everyone like where they live, but it really does sound cold up there for a long time each year."

Yup always lived here... though I have moved provinces... born and raised in Quebec and moved to Ontario when I retired. BUT the weather didn't really change.  Ever winter I bitch about the snow and the cold - and how I wished we lived somewhere warmer - but you know there's always a trade off - for example British Columbia - specifically Vancouver - is not nearly as cold as the other provinces... and they don't get as much snow.. BUT they get rain...... days and days and days of rain.  and yeah our winters can be long - we tend to say 6 months of winter -- BUT truthfully it isn't that long.. not actual winter - snow and cold.  This year we didn't have any snow till after Christmas! We only had about 2 or 3 major snow events... and only a couple of weeks of extreme cold (like -30C which is -22F) and here it is end of March and our temperatures are up to +19 (yesterday) which is 66F. 

Thanks for the question PK !!

OUCH!

 

We had nothing planned for this weekend - and yet I was still surprised when Sir Steve turned to me on Saturday and said "15 minutes - naked bent over the bed" ... There is something about having to watch the clock tick down 15 minutes you know? it's called ANTICIPATION and it does quite a number on me.

For some reason I have been really wimpy recently - so Sir Steve has just been using his hands to spank.  BUT on Saturday night he pulled out the leather strap......... 

 

My heart started pounding.  One of Sir Steve's 'talents' is building up the pain - starting slow and warming me up... almost teasing me - making me want more and more...
On Saturday he started with his hands - making me do the 'subbie dance' .... and making me wiggle and truthfully want more........... When he felt the need in me he would strike with the leather paddle - making me gasp..... and dance faster..... then back to hands and without warning paddle - back and forth - till it was more paddle than hands

After 30 minutes at least - I was happily riding the pain waves - finding my rhythm ...loving every minute of it.

 

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Fondles asked a question........ a good one in my opinion!! and because it fits so well with today's post ... I thought I would answer it now........ 

 Would you name 3 implements that are employed regularly (besides the hand) on your behind and rank them in order of preference pls :)

Believe it or not I actually had to ask Sir Steve what my 3 favourite toys are...

In order of preference as requested........

#1 

Sir Steve has a massive flogger... from North Bound Leather for any Canadians who might know it........ 

 

 

The flogger is big and heavy - check out the knot !!  and the number of falls... He introduced  it to me 10 years ago when we first played... and once I got/get over the shock........ it has the most amazing thud!!  can I say ' HEAVY'.........  

#2
has to be my quirt... purchased at a tack shop (well used and well worn)

for those that may not know - a quirt is short handled riding whip.  I LOVE whips - but unfortunately whips tend to be too long in the house (or most clubs really - they're best used in the great outdoors)
I love how the quirt bites into my flesh and it leaves the BEST marks!

#3
is my riding crop - also purchased at a tack shop.  (I make the reference to where I bought them - because they are REAL implements - and I often comment how both the quirk and the crop are meant for horse's not humans - hoping to get some sympathy - never works though - grinning)

 

 

I think the crop is a close cousin to the cane - only they last longer.. any cane I've had never seems to last very long.  The intensity of the crop is so different from any of the other toys... the pain is condensed to the stripe - not spread out ... and too the crop can leave some pretty spectacular marks!

Thanks Fondles for the question
For everyone else - I promise I am going to answer them over the next few days... and for those of you who haven't asked but want to......... what are you waiting for?? (cheeky grin)
 

Sunday Sentiments

Question and Answer month - I've received a couple of questions - I will answer them - promise! - on Monday 

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UGH It's a Headache Saturday...

 

 

Let me start off by saying I mostly do not drink.  I have always had this weird reaction to alcohol like one drink and I will be tipsy.  O.N.E. drink!   AND before I even go to bed I am suffering from a hang over.  So yeah I don't drink - often... mostly it's only in the summer on the weekend - one glass of wine with my dinner.

For some reason drinking - specifically having a glass of wine - seems like such an 'adult' thing to do.  AND I like the imagery that I have in my head of drinking a glass of wine.

I also realize I am a bit indoctrinated to believe that alcohol will relax you and take all the stress away.

SO........... 

I suggested to Sir Steve that we have finger foods and wine for supper last night.  (I had finger foods in the freezer - leftover from Christmas believe it or not - battered shrimp and sausage rolls) He thought it was a great idea..... 

So I poured the wine as I started to cook dinner.......

AND yes that is my one glass of wine!!!  

We ate our dinner - and sipped the wine...... and in no time at all I was giggly and a little unsteady on my feet.  (le sigh - I'm never gonna grow up!) 

By bedtime I had the beginnings of a headache.... and a bit of an upset stomach.  This morning I have a hang over!! 

Know what?? I think I'll give up on being grown up!   put the wine away..... and enjoy my soda or chocolate milk - I prefer the kid in me more than the adult anyway (grinning)

Life is good when you know your limitations.......


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It seems March is Question and Answer month - IF you have any questions for me about anything just ask and I will answer........ (though I would think by now you all know me pretty damn well!!)

Is It Wrong?

 

 

Is it wrong that I am doing the happy dance?? Today is Sir Steve's first day working from home.  

AND I get to do my groceries this morning - relaxed - no rushing to get it done.  

THEN I get to go home and put them away quietly with no stress - no watching the clock.  

AND then - this afternoon I get to go and get my hair cut!  Relaxed not exhausted from rushing around.

It's been a year - I haven't been vaccinated and already life is feeling just a little bit more normal.

Life is good when you can do the Happy Dance! 

Help has arrived...

 

 and that help is Sir Steve.  He came home from work yesterday and told me he had had a meeting with his boss.  As of this Friday he is going to work from home Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  AND he will oversee the home schooling 

I feel as though a HUGE weight has been lifted off my shoulders.  I honestly feel .. now.. that we are in this together.  AND I believe the lil one will see her father and I working together and she won't be able to play games with us.

There IS a light at the end of the tunnel.

So this happened..... (edited)

So I wrote the following early this morning... and I was feeling fragile ... and honestly couldn't face comments... but so far I have had 2 people speak to me about comments and putting them back... so ok.. comments are back - but no promise I'll respond to them today.

 So - the lil one has been rebelling and not doing her school work - saying 'it's too much' .  Sir Steve and I tried putting our collective foot down... Sir Steve appealed to the mother who says she can't (won't) do anything!...and  what happened was I became the 'bad guy'.  The lil one won't talk to me or even look at me.  She told her father I was mad at her - Sir Steve pointed out that he was mad too. Obviously that didn't matter.

So I quit.  pointe finale!  Now Sir Steve and her mother can figure out her schooling.... and everything that goes with that.  I told Sir Steve in front of the lil one - that I will print up her school work - and I will upload the finished work - but Sir Steve will be responsible for checking the work and giving it to me - I quit.

I'm too old for this shit. 

Spoiled

 

 

Because of who I am - I tend to attempt to fix my own problems... which means I have to identify the problem and the cause first.  All winter I have fought the winter blues... I didn't know why this year was worse - blamed it on the pandemic ...... but in the back of my mind I knew the pandemic was part of it - but not all of it as I tend to hibernate during the winter at the best of times.  So.... what was the root problem.

Last week - after a couple of rainy dull days - I complained to Sir Steve that our living room was SO dark.  We painted 2 years ago.  We painted it a cafe au lait colour.  It looked great... BUT then we replaced our cream coloured wing back chair and ottoman with a grey/brown lazy boy chair.  When I was looking at the living room critically last week I realized all the furniture blended with the walls and top it off with chocolate brown curtains in the window.... making it look like a brown blob in my mind's eye.  There was no bright spot... no pop.  It was dark and depressing. 

Sir Steve said 'so what colour would you paint it?' .. I kinda shrugged and said 'white'
He suggested that on Saturday we go out and pick  some paint and repaint the living room!!  I couldn't believe it!!  repaint it after only 2 years??!!!  OMG  Y E S!!!  There was something else bugging me about the living room too... it was the lighting - the floor lamp was dated.. as was the table lamp.  IF we were gonna paint then why not find some new lighting?!!  Amazon is my friend!  Found a floor lamp and matching table lamp.. best part - they were on sale AND would be delivered by Sunday!!! 

So Saturday we flew out to the shops - found a paint called Alpine Arctic (who names the paints??!!)  It is kinda of a grey green ..... pale pale green - you kinda have to squint and tilt your head the right way to see it (grinning) but it's perfect!!

Sunday morning Sir Steve was up by 7am!!  and got started painting... and by dinner time Sunday night it was done!!  I was SO happy - and we both agree it makes a HUGE difference .... so much brighter and cheery.  

Wanna see some pics??? You know I've got some.............. 

 

Living room before........ 

 

Living room after............

 

Floor lamp before...........

 

Floor lamp after........... 

 

 

Table lamp before.....

Table lamp after........ 

And a bonus change - When we were out buying paint Sir Steve suggested we check out kitchen faucets.  Ours was old and dull and dripping...... I have lusted after one that has a pull out nozzle that sprays........ and I got one!!!

Old kitchen faucet

 

New kitchen faucet....

 

Life is good when your Sir loves you enough to paint ............ again!  

 

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Now I am off to visit around blog land (as the laundry washes)  cause yesterday was a day from hell and I didn't get any visiting done ... will share with you all tomorrow.....