Monday, April 18, 2011


It was easier then....... when the girls were small ....... to fix their hurts.  A band-aide usually did it.

Oh there were serious injuries - broken bones - cracked skulls - wrecked knees - trips to the emergency room.  But somehow we all survived it.

The girls are all grown up......... but I am still "mom" and still who they come to when they are hurt.... been through it with the youngest and am now going through it with the eldest.

Eight months ago eldest daughter 'miscarried' (according to the doctor) and 3 weeks after that she was rushed back into hospital because it hadn't been a miscarriage - but rather an ectopic pregnancy - she lost the tube and her appendix.  A band-aide wouldn't fix it.

Then a month ago she lost her job after 12 years.  A band-aide wouldn't fix it.

Then this week her husband of almost 2 years told her he no longer wanted to be married.  A band-aide won't fix that either.  

And how I wish it would.  I wish I could take all the hurt away ... make her smile again.. make her see she is a vibrant young woman who will survive this experience.  My words sound hollow - "you'll come out of this stronger than ever"... "you will be ok" ... "you can do this"  I know all those things are true....... it's just right now she doesn't know it... all she knows is heart break and a deep abiding sadness.  

I wish a band-aide was all it took to fix grown up hurts.


  1. your words are hollow unless they are said that way, something I hardly think you would ever do.

    Being there is more than enough to support your " girls " just like them being there for you in time of need.

    Like you have done in the past, learn from your mistakes so you won't hopefully do them ever again, your " girls " must do the same thing.

    I wish you and your " girls " ( they are really women now ) all the best in this problem and ones to come.


  2. A bruised and broken heart is so painful to see in someone you love so dearly, it is so difficult to watch and not be able to fix it,but life teaches us that we do recover, we do move on, things get better, they stop hurting with an all consuming pain...having your mums love and support helps..............the old adage of "it isn't what life throws at us that makes us the people we are, but how we deal with it " is so true, but just not what you want to hear when you are feeling like your girl.Hoping her pain eases.

  3. Anonymous11:58 am

    Sometimes all we need is a shoulder to cry on, even if you can't say it's going to be ok.

  4. sometimes all we can do is sit with someone else through their pain... I know that her hurts are hard to watch, but your willingness to be there with her is enough. It really is... She's your daughter, so she is strong enough to go through this and come out on the other side. Keep on believing in her. It is the best you can give her.

    hugs, swan

  5. You may think the words hollow but surely they help her through...that is a lot to be going through- I wish her well.

  6. I am going to tell you now, sometimes your eldest daughter just needs to hear those words, because after everything she has been through I am betting she forgets how awesome she is.

  7. I'm so sorry she's going through such difficult times. She is very lucky to have your support.


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