Since the beginning of this epidemic our morning news show has opened each show every morning with a ' Today is ....(insert day of the week)......... '
This morning I was over on ' A Place to Share' and Terps was talking about being thankful for routines. I sat up and went 'she's so right!! It's great to be back to daily routines
Today is THURSDAY! that means cleaning day around here.... scrubbing and polishing making every thing pretty (at least for a few hours). Routines are soothing for me - if it's Monday it's laundry day - if it's Tuesday it's baking day .. etc... reassuring - as much as the world spins out of control - I can still have some control over MY world with routines.
Life is good when there are routines to follow.
Interestingly, by contrast I find myself fighting routine recently rather than being comforted by it. A great example of how similar stimuli can end with different approaches.
ReplyDelete(An interesting coincidence is that I just completed a rather detailed comment to your past post on punishment. In it there is what I think a good fleshing out of how we can relate to the same issues while reaching different conclusions and also different approaches over time.
I made the comment, late as it might be as my good faith participation in your blog. I found your response to my comment the other day to be encouraging. I will say this though, your explanation that you did not leave a comment on my chastity post prompted me to make this suggestion: you mentioned that 'next time' if you are not familiar with a subject, you might just say so. It's honest, and I have had plenty of people do that. But consider this: rather than merely admit inexperience with a topic, why not just ask a probing question to understand it better? That would lead to discussion even on a topic that is unfamiliar whereas a "nice post, but don't know much about it" sort of stops the discussion right there. Just another thought.)
kd - point taken about my commenting on things that don't appeal or don't interest me...
ReplyDelete(thinking to myself - you are a stern teacher aren't you?? grinning)
BUT you are right I could have asked the question that was rolling around in my head when I read that post.....
'why in god's name would you want to suffer through orgasm denial or control'?? but that's just me -- orgasm to me - either mine or Sir Steve's is pure joy - something to be celebrated :)
LOL. Welllllll.............I may come across as primarily submissive but I spent a lot of quality time in the past as a Top. And without bragging....I was pretty good at it! LOL. Left you another comment on a past post. The one with the whartenburg wheel and knife play.
ReplyDeleteAs for your question, it's a legitimate one. I would say that for me orgasm denial and control achieves three main benefits that I do not experience with frequent, uncontrolled orgasm:
1: Having my sexual release controlled by a trusted loved one elevates the importance of it. If I could just masturbate frequently and freely, the repetitive frequency tends to diminish the sensation and its feeling of reward. It goes from being something rare and special to like ordering a whopper.
2: there is certainly a biochemical component. Over time denial changes one's mental outlook in significant ways. So much so that Rosa is careful and cognizant of the balance necessary to be "just enough but not too much". I give her enormous credit for her admirable intuition with her decisions, but she will still talk to me at times as well.
and 3: To be brutally frank, denial sexualizes not having sex. If sex is a regular thing and then you can't always get it, you can feel disappointed or frustrated. But if the frustration is pervasive and intentional, you are kind of having a special kind of sex even when you aren't having actual sex.
I hope that helps. I can say that at those times I was free to do as I pleased, I usually felt bad after masturbating. I never feel that way now.
Ah morningstar, You have a high energy level. And sometimes reading about your routines exhausts me. That is not a criticism... I only wish I had the energy and thought to organize as you do. I have a loose schedule of when things get done but often I find my energy going in a different direction and put things off. It gets done but not always on schedule. My mom always said I was a bit of a procrastinator. Learned the definition of the word when I was in second grade and she used it in a teacher-parent conference.
ReplyDeleteExample I should be dusting today but instead I'm reading the internet. Alas... dusting will wait.
Anonymous:
ReplyDeleteKeeping the house clean, doing the laundry etc are ways I exhibit my serving side. It pleases Sir Steve to have everything in order and knowing he can rely on me to make sure things run (relatively) smoothly while he is at work.
That being said - he will jump in to help when I am feeling a little overwhelmed - like with the Christmas baking.
AND probably being raised by an OCD / germaphobic mother contributes to my need for cleanliness and order :)
You mean the days have names? I'd kind of forgotten...
ReplyDeleteInteresting! My routine is I have no routine. I am impressed if I get up and DON'T fall down the stairs!
ReplyDeleteHugs
Boo
Boo - LOL -- I love your sense of humour!!
ReplyDeleteBut routines?? you're not back at work yet right?? I am hearing you might be getting the vaccine sooner than later -- front line worker and all that. I can't wait to be vaccinated -- oh I know I'll still have to take precautions but I won't be as stressed
Hi Morningstar, it's interesting, I usually thrive on routine, especially when it comes to household chores. I do find them soothing having OCD tendencies lol. However, right now I am still on holiday and way out of routine and not looking forward to getting back to routine...work, transport etc.
ReplyDeleteSleeping for one is so out of whack right now. Hmm, maybe getting back to routine might be a good thing lol
Hugs
Roz
Roz - sleeping for one?? I don't understand..... everything ok?
ReplyDeleteOh oops, sorry, I meant sleeping, for one thing lol
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