Are you a PeaceKeeper OR a PeaceMaker??
Windy got me thinking about which one I was in her post today "No on Peace". My knee jerk reaction was "neither - I'm a SH*T disturber".
I can be a little hard on myself I think....... for the most part I HATE confrontations - I will actually get up and leave if there is a 'heated discussion' going on. (that dates back to the "happy" family Sunday dinners at my grandmother's - where discussions always got heated and voices were raised and I would think I was going to throw up)
When I really think about which I am - I believe I am both.... first I work to MAKE peace .. then I work doubly hard to KEEP that peace - at least in my close relationships. I have learned (am learning?) how to voice problems for the best solution. I don't point fingers as much as I used to....... I hear myself saying more and more 'I am FEELING' ... no finger pointing - no blame.
BUT - out in the world - where stupid people live - I'm not so politically correct.......or calm. I suffer from knee jerk reactions........ verging on temper tantrums. People who lie - outward lie - do something to my zen........
I go from zen calm.............
to emotional eruptions.............. in record time
With stupid people who lie....... I can not hold my tongue....... I try but fail every time....I don't think it's a desire to be right - it's more a 'don't insult my intelligence' - like telling me you are not EVEN doing groceries when last week you were late picking up cause you were grocery shopping! Oh and let's not forget someone who didn't pay any bills for over a year and then claimed they didn't understand why they lost their house...or how about someone who got so caught up in a fantasy they had that they landed up making stupid decisions that landed them up in major hot water...........
It makes my head spin - honestly! I just want to retreat inside our home - close and lock the doors and shut the world out....... cause ya can't fix stupid.
Life is challenging when stupid people disrupt your peace keeping efforts.......
I go out of my way to keep the peace too. I taught 6th grade for 30 years and had all the 'drama' I could ever want. As for going off on lying idiots, I've mostly learned to ignore them too. Some tell their outrageous lies mostly because they are desperate for attention. I refuse to give it to them. Although I do often come home and rant to Nick or the kids, beginning with - "You won't believe what this asshole said!' But since that are usually right with me on whatever it is we still have peace at home.
ReplyDeleteTo clear things up - I do not have an accent y'all.
ReplyDeleteI'm a peacekeeper, don't like drama or upset, sometimes though it is unavoidable, I did chuckle at you not being pc, no I don't think I am either, well it's more that I get irritated by this culture we have of people being offended so easily and for what I consider stupid things, it's getting to the point where you won't be able to say anything because somebody will be offended by it, I have a niece who is a vegan and considers it offensive if anyone eats meat when she is around....geez it does my head in....ok, rant over :)
ReplyDeleteI try and keep the peace between family members only when not doing so would cause me problems. Otherwise I've learnt to live by this mantra - Not my circus, not my monkeys. And I apply that to friends as well. If people are going to get upset with each other at a party cos someone made a stupid comment, then it's not my problem. They can fight their own battles and defend their own positions.
ReplyDeleteThey don't call me Scrappy for nothing lol, as I said to Windy. It's usually the idiots that bring Scrappy to the fore.
ReplyDeleteOtherwise, I think it depends on the issue and situation. I would say I'm more peace keeper. I hate conflict.
Hugs
Roz
I think you and I are the same. Zen to Lava in less than 10 seconds. I thought I would out grow it, but apparently not.
ReplyDeleteHugs
Boo
I certainly never out grew it.... mind you I excuse it by saying the ones I loose my temper/patience with ALWAYS deserve it (sweet angelic smile)
DeleteSeriously though - this tendency to knee jerk reactions ruins my calm..... and I HATE that :(