Monday, March 12, 2012
Endings and beginnings...
This weekend was about so much more than munches with new folks - so much more than spankings and loving and bonding....... so much more.
It was a strange 'awakening' really.
On Saturday W took me to find the graves of my Aunt O, and my parents. There are no words to describe the emotions that washed over my body standing over Aunty O's grave.. remembering ... in a quick flash ..... her life... her love .. her support. And then the hunt to find my parents.......... Mom was buried in 1996 - I haven't been back since then....... but somehow my memory steered me .. I knew it was on the North side of the cemetery - I remembered my father's casket being carried up a hill - I remembered a big tree sheltering him... us. And we found it.. found them... buried at the top of the hill under a big tree.......I stood there reading the headstone - over and over and remembering my dad's funeral (for whatever reason I have little or no memory of my mom's.)
And then we left - drove out the gates and my spirits felt lifted... as though I had faced some fear and stared it down.
W and I spent a lot of time talking too. Words were said - feelings/emotions exposed. And understanding came (to me anyway).
Life IS an adventure. There are no endings only more beginnings....... and I am excited again.......... to face the new beginnings / challenges.
Life IS good
I am happy.
I AM loved.