I have a little girl - we'll call her Waif - who came to me in January. Her father was very clear about where she came from - and how he didn't want her.
She was brought to his office one day just before Christmas - by her mother - with all her worldly belongings. Her mother told the father she had raised her for 10 years and now she was done. HE could take over. He told me he never wanted "kids".... he had no intention of having any responsibility for her.. she could live at his place - eat and sleep there - but that was where his responsibility ended. (for the record here - all of this was stated in front of Waif)
So she has become our responsibility for the last 2 1/2 months. We make sure her homework is done - we are teaching her some manners and proper behaviours for a little 10 year old girl. We are fighting an uphill battle.
In the last 2 1/2 months -
I have seen this child hanging around the corner at 6 in the evening in very inappropriate clothing - wiggling her ass and being very coy with any and all males that pass by.
I have caught this child pressing up against boys in the school - it is rumoured that she has been seen kissing some of my older boys behind the school.
I have bitten my tongue more than once - reminding myself that Waif has no respect for adults - and has been given no reason to respect them or trust them.
From time to time - rarely and very briefly - I get a glimpse of the frightened child hiding inside Waif. She doesn't let it show often - but the child is there - hidden away - and I fear - disappearing fast.
Father rarely if ever picks her up...... usually it is an older sister (I won't even go there talking about her!!) But every once in a while he shows up - talking on his cell - being/acting like "Mr. Cool"... and god's gift to the female species.... a 50 year old gift!!!
In the last 4 weeks - Waif has been left with us way past closing time - some nights as long as 30 minutes past closing time. Father told me 2 weeks ago that he had fallen and broken his ribs..... and added with a chuckle - that would teach him to get piss drunk. Waif told me that he got drunk and got into a fight and broke his ribs.
I am losing the battle with / for Waif. And yeah it breaks my heart. I know .. I DO know.. I can't win / save them all............ but it always hurts when one is slipping away. Yesterday I met with my principal - DYP (department of youth protection) has been called ...... AND ........ if father doesn't pick up on time - we have the right to call the police and tell them she has been left. He never picks up his cell - and the mail box is full.
Sometimes it is just overwhelming what some people do to innocent children.
I can't believe I am saying this but this reminds me of something Rayne told me when I was asking her why she wanted to help me, she couldn't help everyone. So why did I matter? She said "It mattered to that one little star fish".
ReplyDeleteA boy was on the sea and saw a bunch of star fish who washed up on the shore , and he picked one up and tossed it back into the water, so his mother asked why he helped that starfish, surely he couldn't save them all , so what did it matter? He responded "It mattered to that one little star fish."
I don't think you should stop trying to help Waif, even if that means calling the DYP, sometimes prolonging it can cause more damage then help. I really hope this girl gets the help she needs and a fair shot at life, and I hope you get to help her achieve that. I can't think of anything more fulfilling.
Some people should just not have children.
ReplyDelete*grumble*
My thoughts and prayers are going out today to you and Waif. Part of me hopes that the father doesn't show up so that maybe Waif can get some help and a caring foster family. People like these make think a psych eval should be done as soon as puberty hits and that forced sterilization isn't such a bad idea.
ReplyDelete~AA~
That breaks my heart, I commend you for all you are doing for her, and, while you may not see the difference now, hopefully she will look back one day and remember that SOMEONE tried to help her.
ReplyDeleteDon't give up, you never know!
Keep doing what you can and let her know that you're there for her .... and hope that it gets through to that scared little girl.
ReplyDeletePoor kid .....
*delurks for the first time*
ReplyDeleteplease don't give up on little Waif...it really is sick what people can do to their children. Call whatever Child Protection Services is in your province and report everything- CPS rather investigate 10 false accusations than miss one where a child was being hurt. Don't bite your tongue- talk to her and let her see you care. And caring sometimes mean corrections and lectures about respecting yourself and your body.
Your story hits vrey close to hme for me. I work in a group home and I had Waif two years in the future. I don't know where she is now- she was moved after running away- but it wouldn't surprise me to find out she was dead. At 12 that little girl had been through so much and no one had reached out to her- to tell her it wasn't alright that people hit her, or sold her body for drugs, or ignored her when she said no. When someone finally reached out that hand to her she clung to it so hard- but she also got so scared that she hurt herself. Last I heard she was in a high security home and had been tackled from a helicopter when she tried to run away. We shouldn't have to treat our broken children like criminals to protect them from themselves.
Sorry for that rant, but my Waif seems very close to me today <3
~Eamane
I have to agree with Dae.
ReplyDeleteHopefully something can be done for this child.
Prefectdt
My aunt used to call me the waif...
ReplyDeleteThis sadly reminds me of my oldest and fighting against her "sperm donor" to stop the BS.