A weird thing about me - something a doctor remarked on many years ago - is that I don't see myself - or desire to be - thin and fit. Even when I do lose weight I tend to stay in my "big" clothes - this way no one sees the changes happening - including myself. I look in the mirror and see the clothes I have always worn - not the me hiding inside them.
A change started a couple of weeks ago - when I bought those one piece Pjs ....... and I looked (and saw myself) in the mirror - wow!! who was that woman??!!
Tentatively I have been purchasing new clothes one piece or so at a time - I don't try them on at the shops - I just make sure if they don't fit I can bring them back.......... but every single thing fits. I even found a dress and two suede skirts hiding in the back on my cupboard and tried them on - and they fit too!!
Slowly I am transforming - a bit like a butterfly climbing out of its cocoon - if that isn't too bold a statement to make. I look at myself in the mirror every day when I put on a new outfit (never used to look in the mirror) and surprise myself every single day.
Confidence is building -
Maybe - just maybe - I am building a life I deserve - not for anyone else - but just for me! It is a good feeling!
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