Service Sub

It seems to me that when submissives talk about being a "service" sub they have these glamorous images of serving him coffee on their knees - blow jobs - hot maid outfits and never really getting dirty.  (who would want to get a french's maid outfit dirty that probably cost more than a week's wages?!)

It seems to me that a lot of the images that come to mind when we think/ discuss D/s relationships - involve hot images of sexy activities.

 The truth of the matter is a 'good' service submissive is not glamorous or even that sexy.  It involves rubber gloves - not pretty latex gloves - but ugly bright yellow rubber gloves that our mothers used.  It involves hot water and cleaning fluids and scrubbing floors that are really dirty and need to be really cleaned.

Service involves making meals he wants to eat when you aren't hungry or don't really like what he wants for dinner.  It means watching one more television show that you can't stand,  It means washing his dirty clothes and folding them and putting them away so he doesn't have to think about it and probably won't even notice.

Service doesn't involve Masters standing with their hands on their hips watching your every move - with a whip dangling over their shoulder....threatening a good beating if you miss a fleck of dust.  The reality - the truth - is you clean and cook and take care of him because deep down inside you have a burning need to do it.

And if at the end of the day - he finds a whip or flogger and you get your ass beat - or you have mind blowing orgasms - it probably has nothing to do with the service  - but more with his needs.

So make sure - before you sign up for a "service subbie" position that you can see past the fantasy and into the reality - and do it for the internal pleasure it gives you to make His life easier.

     

Adventures and Date Night (part 2)

W and I have this - ummm what to call it?? - agreement is as good a term as any other.  Most of the time we go "dutch" when we go out.  BUT in our agreement one or the other can invite the other one on a "date"... in which case the invitee pays.  

A couple of weeks back I really wanted to go and see the Buskers - so I invited W on a date - to see the Buskers and go for dinner.  We had a delightful time  walking the main street in Kingston  - in sunshine - and had dinner in a delightful restaurant.

This past weekend W invited me on a date to go and see the 75th Anniversary of  the Fort Henry Tattoo.  There is a whole long history on military tattoos - but what we went to see was a show of various marching military bands - drums and pipes.  
 
Now where as *my* date was held on a nice sunny evening in downtown Kingston - W's choice of date involved being in the Old Fort - exposed to the elements - sitting on bleachers in a parade ground of an old Fort.  (btw - I LOVE the old fort and W and I have been to to it on many different occasions - one - if memory serves me right - involved my flashing W for photo purposes - anyway I digress) 

We decided to have dinner at the Fort and try out the show night Barbeque.  It sounded like a good idea at the time.  However - despite arriving at the suggested 5:30 hour...... there was already a long line up for hamburgers and hotdogs and salads.  Only to discover there really wasn't enough seating - visitors who were not having dinner had taken over the picnic tables to sit and chat while they waited for the gates to open for the tattoo (at 6:30)

As W and I balanced dinner in one hand - drinks in the other - and squeezed onto a picnic bench to consume our meal - I watched as black clouds rolled in over Lake Ontario.  BIG BLACK threatening clouds I might add.

At 6:30 we filed into the parade grounds and found a seat on the top level of the bleachers (good for picture taking).  By this time we had the rain coats on ... and finally I gave in and popped the umbrella.  

I could not resist teasing W about his choice of date night - sitting in the rain, huddled under an umbrella and promised I would "bitch" about it on my blog.  (cheeky grin)  I do love to "poke" the dom.

I leaned around W and shot this picture of the "nuts" like us who by hook or by crook were gonna see this infamous Tattoo.

The show started on time at 7:30 with the Town Crier (yes Kingston has a town crier who actually shows up at City Hall regularly to announce the news)

The clouds were breaking up and we were all praying we had seen the worst of the rain.

And then we were entertained by drum and pipe bands from various Ontario cities - with varying degrees of fame.

By far the most entertaining band - was the Junior Naval band.  They consisted of young people between the ages of 14 and 18 and had only been together for 3 weeks.  Their band leader was full of enthusiasm and energy and boy did it come across in the bands performance.  Those kids looked like they were having fun!!!

Then there was the Pipes and Drums from Hamilton I think, with their Scottish dancers,  By this point the sun had set and picture taking was more difficult...AND the rain had returned -  but the young girls were charming to watch.

And finally - what I had been waiting for - my favourite band - The Old Fort Henry Guard.  More historical than the other bands - they went through their paces with finesse.   

All the bands came back for the grande finale - the flag was lowered to taps - and then there were fire works that were loud - very loud!!  

 As much as I have had fun teasing W over "his date night" It really was good fun and one might say almost romantic.. the two of us huddled under a big black umbrella at the top of the bleachers in the far corner ............. hell if we had been teenagers we might have even done some "necking".
 

Adventures and date nights (part 1)

 Friday evening W and I decided to go to a munch - about an hour and half away.  W had a doctor's appointment here in the city mid afternoon - and our  plan was to head off immediately after.  Now I really should pay a little more attention to times for munches.  We were on the highway heading off to the munch when W suggested we stop off in a city on the way and "poke around".  I looked at the clock - it was pushing 5 pm.  so I said I didn't think it was such a great idea.  (thinking the munch was at 6 pm) AND W did want to stop at the BIG apple store on the way,

Now I have heard of this BIG Apple store for almost 10 months now I guess.  And I vaguely remembered seeing some BIG apple sitting on the edge of the highway the few times we have done the drive to Toronto.  I had also heard this BIG Apple store makes the very best ever apple pies.  Well I am not a big pie fan - though I don't mind apple pies.  BUT my favourite apple dish happens to be apple bread and apple muffins made on a local farm in Montreal.  I couldn't imagine anyone matching their baked goods.

We stopped at the Big Apple -- with all the tourists and their buses.  OH MY GOD!!  who stops in the middle of nowhere - on the 401 - to take pictures of a BIG Apple??!!  Hundreds of people that's who!!  When we got out of the car my head kept swiveling this way and that............ there was a petting zoo (mostly goats and smelly sheep and chickens) .. there was a mini putt .. and a train (which wasn't working and no where to be seen) AND the huge shop.  

We entered the shop and the scents were amazing.......... cinnamon and ginger and apples.  The counters were groaning under packages of apple fritters, apple jellies, apple pies, and more apple pies, apple muffins and apple breads.  There was a restaurant and a touristy trap gift shop.

Fortunately the 4 bus load of tourists were just finishing up their visit and were in the process of leaving.  W and I got to poke around quietly.  I took stock of their products and picked up one loaf of apple bread..... deciding if it was half as good as the apple bread/muffins from the Montreal farm - we could always come back and pick up more (but I had my doubts) 

After paying for our purchases (W bought some apple cookies) we headed outside to take in the petting farm ......... one thing about petting farms that I will never get over is the stench........ ewwwwwwwwwwwww.... 

Then we piled in the car and drove the last 10 minutes to the town where the munch was.  That's when W told me the munch started at 7!!  (who plans a dinner munch for 7??!!)  and it wasn't quite 6 pm.  We decided to follow the road south until we hit Lake Ontario (just to pass some time)  

The view was magnificent.  The sound of the water lapping on the shore hypnotic.  Honestly I could have spent hours just sitting by the water's edge with a good book listening to the birds and the water and enjoying the solitary quiet.  I even dared to dip my toes in the water.......... YIKES!!!  nearly forgot how cold the damn water IS up here in the Great White North.

Finally we headed back to town and the munch.  As always - good fun - good people - lots of conversation and laughter.

ooooooooooops I nearly forgot to report on the apple bread.  I had some toasted for breakfast on Saturday and W and I had ham sandwiches on it for lunch on Saturday - and I have to admit - it was pretty damn good!!!!  I am thinking we'll be heading back to pick up a couple of loaves and freeze them.



Stay tuned for tomorrow's post about "date night" ............ 

Sunday Sentiments

Thinking

I read something over on fetlife - well there have been more than a few articles written on "permission protocols" but this one made me stop and think - and nod - and then finally say "YES"

Our protocols - rules if you like - were often frowned upon in the general BDSM community.  At the beginning I was confused by this and yeah - sometimes I was hurt.  IF W and I decided that we wanted rules or protocols in our relationship - why shouldn't we have them?? What business was it of anyone else??? 

But then it was pointed out to me that some of the rules/protocols involved other people - and that wasn't consensual and therefore broke the first rule of BDSM - everything has to be consensual!  Can I say confusing????!!!  The thing I loved about BDSM (besides the spankings, floggings, whips and chains oh my!!)  were protocols and rules.  and yet here I was being told they were non-consensual for other people.

Now you might be asking yourself if they were OUR rules/protocols how did they impact other folks.  Here's an example................IF someone requested a "friendship" on Fetlife - I had to explain to them that I had to get permission from Sir before I could friend anyone.  That rule involves other people in our dynamic - in our rules.  

HOWEVER -   if that someone who wants to friend me - does not like our rule about permission - they are free to withdraw their request.  Right?? So it is still consensual - they can say "NO". 

And yeah see - this rule about friendship requests - just makes perfect sense to me - even in a vanilla world.  Why in god's name would I want to sneak around behind W's back making "friends" without telling him???  Do you get it?? Friends should be shared.  It doesn't mean I have to like all of W's friends - or that he has to like all mine - but no one should "hide" friendships... that just leads to problems I think.

A lot of folks have never understood our protocols/rules.  It always made me feel I had to hide them - not talk about them - keep them hidden like something dirty and perverted.  How weird is THAT?? in a perverted community I am hiding something as simple as "rules I live by".  

I am not saying I am gonna shout them from the roof tops - or insist everyone live by them and if they don't they are "doing it all wrong" .. no no no.... all I am saying is respect my right to live by them.  Simple eh?? 

And that dear friends is just some early Saturday morning thinking.................

Sunny Day

Was a sunny day
Not a cloud was in the sky
Not a negative word was heard
From the peoples passing by
Was a sunny day
All the birdies in the trees
And the radio’s singing song
All the favorite melodies

Paul Simon

 Yes today is indeed a "sunny day".  And it came about because of a spanking.... yup a spanking!!  weird eh??? 

Well I find it weird.  I was thinking yesterday afternoon - after the spanking and 2 orgasms - how weird it was.  How a spanking can change my mindset drastically.

First I had worked hard to trash the feelings of not being a good subbie - over the dinner episode - by myself - and I had done a good job.  And I had  that warm glow that comes from serving W and knowing my place.

BUT

add a spanking and it's as though my position as W's submissive is re-affirmed.  It's as though a spanking  re-affirms that W sees me as his submissive.  It's not me myself and I doing this - but it is a combined effort - the two of us. 

shrug - ok - it probably all sounds a bit weird - I admit it - but weird or not - it gives me warm fuzzies and an "all's right with the world" kind of feeling.   

Weekly - biweekly -  hell daily spankings sound like a GREAT idea to me.. keep me grounded - keep me in my place - keep the sun shining and no clouds in the sky !! 

Fine tuning

When I came to Kingston 3 weeks ago - W met me with a hug, a kiss, and a permanent collar.  It was very tempting to put the collar back around my neck where I felt it belonged - no - more than that - where I desperately wanted it.  But something stopped me.  I asked if we could stick to the schedule of 3 months.

You see - before I came up here permanently - W and I had been working on a contract - both legal (a necessity for the Ontario government) and private - a BDSM contract.  It was my request that I be collared within 3 months of arriving here. Something made me insist on a waiting period.  I hadn't thought about it - the number just popped into my head and after the fact it seemed like a good idea.

I figured 3 months would give us both time to adjust - to work out the kinks (so to speak) and meld together as more than a couple - but as a Dominant / submissive couple.

We had always agreed that if the BDSM part of our relationship didn't work out - we would still live together as friends/roommates.

I have been quiet this week - here on The Journey - because I have had some internal struggles this week.  I don't know where they came from - or why.  But there they were - again.  And again - believe it or not - it was over food.

Ok maybe not food per say - but - damn I am not even sure I can explain it ............ 

I had noticed that W was coming to help more and more in the kitchen at meal times.  It started off with W just making his own breakfast - which is FINE with me - as we have discussed in the past - I am not the brightest star in the early morning - or the most cheerful / graceful submissive.  But W had started coming into the kitchen at lunch time - making his own sandwich while I made my lunch.  At first I was shocked and a little bit upset.......... then I did a shoulder shrug and figured fine if he wants to make his own sandwich - it's no skin off my nose.

But then - Monday night.  W had said at noon he would probably have left over pizza for supper.  I did some quick calculations and figured I could have a toasted bagel or something.  But then around dinner time W announced he wouldn't have the pizza - that he thought he might cook up a hamburger - or some noodles or something.  

I know some of you may not get this.......... but I felt as though He had torn the "consideration" collar right off my neck.  IF I now wasn't going to even make his dinners for him.......... what was I gonna do for him??? How much of a submissive was I if I wasn't even making his meals?!!

I cried - my heart was broken.  I managed to twist his making one supper around to mean he didn't want me as his submissive.  I cried because the dream I had to live 24/7 with him was disappearing in a puff of smoke.  I didn't know what to do - I didn't know what I had done!  (cause ya know I must have done something!)  I thought he liked my cooking - I thought I was a reasonably good cook - I thought my making meals and cleaning up made his life easier - and if it wasn't - then what was the point of me being here??

Then  Tuesday we worked together on the guest room - finding space for some of the leftover "what do we do with this" stuff.  I then cleaned the upstairs - dusting vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom.   And once again life felt as though it was running along smoothly.

Then I decided it was time for me to take some control of the kitchen,  buy ingredients I need to make dinners, make menus.  

AND then I decided each morning to suggest to W what I had planned to cook for dinner.  So yesterday I took off by myself and went to the grocery store with a long list of stuff I needed for "my" kitchen.  Now I am ready to whip up interesting meals for W... last night for example we had barbequed chicken breasts and potatoe salad (W loves potatoe salad!)

God only knows why I thought W didn't want me as his subbie over one dinner - or why I wasn't good enough to be his sub ............. but some fine tuning on my part - and we seem to be back on track.
 

From Ropes to Trains........

We went to the monthly rope class on Friday night.  I think I have mentioned before that Kingston is a rope town - not much percussion play at all.  Might be because you can do rope just about anywhere - and percussion play for a group sorta/kinda requires a large play space - and there just ain't any in Kingston ( unless of course you want to suck up to one group over another - which is just not my style) Finding play spaces in Kingston seems to involve a whole lot of drama - I have been told - though I have not actually experienced it - that the one semi decent dungeon is making it difficult for other groups to rent the space - which I don't get at all!!  if it is a business don't ya think you would rent to anyone??? 

Anywayyyyyyyyyy

I am definitely getting off topic (and the topic is what we did this past weekend).  So we went to the rope class.  Good group of folks - with little or no drama.  This time - just for the hell of it - I tied up W's leg.  Learned some new knots and had a little fun in the process.  I even remember the name of the tie - fotomomo.  Who knew they named all their ties??  Wanna see my efforts?? huh do ya?? 

the outside of the leg..........

I even managed to leave some rope marks that don't really show in the picture......

 Saturday we spent a quiet day at home - but did head off to a munch in the evening.  There are umpteen munches in Kingston (they do LOVE to socialize around this town) though this munch was just over an hour's drive away.  (We don't have enough munches IN Kingston - we now travel to them)  But in all fairness - this is a good group of friendly folk who don't seem to dabble in too much drama.

and on Sunday W decided he wanted to go to a train show......... so off we went...........

I took gobs of pictures of Thomas the Tank and will send them home to the littlest grandkids, who still love trains and especially Thomas.  I am trying to send a letter a week to the grandkids - I remember how much fun it was to get "real" letters when I was a kid!!!

And that was about it for our weekend

Sunday Sentiments

Bread crumbs

Well I headed off yesterday morning - all by my lonesome - to get my hair cut and run some messages.  I have had a deathly fear my entire life of getting lost - so this was a big adventure for me.  

W made sure I had my cell phone with me - and I do have GPS - so there really was no reason to fear getting lost.

I found the hairdressers with no problem at all !!!  (well truth be told I only had to do 4 turns to get there!!  and the mall is on the main street - hard to get lost if you can find the main street right??!!) Had a nice young girl cutting my hair - she took an hour !  and didn't really get the picture I had of my new hair cut (le sigh) At least it will grow!!  I think if I am gonna have to live with a hairdresser's vision of funky hair cut - next time I will go with the shaved on one side and long on the other!!  (though when I mentioned that to W he did look up at me to see if I was joking and then rolled his eyes - so maybe not)

Then I managed to find the hardware store (Lowes) and get the bird seed and the brackets to hang the bird feeders.  But I didn't find the tea house garden statue.  

And then feeling very brave and adventuresome I found the grocery store and bought lunch!!  I did text W in between times to let him now that I wasn't lost just running messages.  Didn't want him sending out the rescue teams!!

When I got home W looked for the tea house and when I explained I didn't find it - and assumed they had sold out - he went back and found one - ugh!!  I don't know how I missed it.

So now I have my tea house, my Buddha, and Confucius garden statues I just need the garden to put them in.  There is a light at the end of that particular tunnel however as I got the final quote on the landscaping (within my budget - IF I don't add the water feature and other fancy stone pathways) and then heard from the deck guy who says he hopes to start work on the deck June 29th ??!!!  - I assume he meant July 29th - which is Monday.  The landscaping crew will come in once the deck is done. I really would like the bulk of the work done this year ............ so next year I can sit outside in the backyard on the new deck - under my BIG red umbrella and enjoy the sunshine and the peace and quiet.

Summer Heat

Normally I love summer heat.  I bask in it.  I purr through it.  I live through the winter months only because the summer heat follows ............... 

BUT this summer heat is too much even for me.  The sky has a smokey haze and the air hangs so heavy you can feel it - touch it - roll it around and pass it along.  This has surpassed summer heat - this is hellish.  (In fact I saw a joke yesterday - something along the lines of the devil asking for his weather back)

But that hasn't stopped W and I.  Yesterday we headed off to the ferry to Wolfe Island where we had an ok lunch sitting on the terrace of the Island Grill looking out over the water and peering through the heat haze to the Kingston skyline.  W took a pic of me (I wasn't really aware he was doing it) and oh my god !!!  I look like I am melting ......... not attractive at all.

We managed, despite the melting heat, to have a little whip session when we got home that left me sweating and purring............. 

Last evening we had storms tear through the area knocking out power and cable and the internet.  UGH!!  But that didn't stop us from attending a poorly attended munch.  I sometimes wonder why some people keep beating a dead horse.  Or maybe it is (as some are speculating) just summer......... just summer heat.

This melting heat has set me on a new quest............. to find a Kingston hair dresser.  The hair is limp and long and desperately needs a cut - at least off my neck.......... I had in the past used some drop in stylists - you know - no appointment necessary type shops.  The first couple of times I managed to get a good cut - not spectacular  - but good.  The last time I looked like I had cut it myself - ugh!!  

This will be a great adventure - a new stylist and I am gonna drive myself.  W says I have to bring my cell so when I get lost I can call him.  (cheeky grin) I'll show him!!  I am also gonna go find my favourite Lowe's and see if I can't buy a pagoda to go in my gardens to be. 

If I am not back here tomorrow you will know I am lost in Kingston - wandering up and down streets trying to find my way back home............. maybe I should leave bread crumbs??     

 

Don't get it...

Nope I honestly don't get it.. there are some pretty weird kinks out there.  And after 20+ years in the kink community I honestly thought I had seen it all.

There are the "littles"

There is some discussion in Montreal - around play parties and the "littles" coming to them and playing.  Turns out some of the straight (for lack of a better term) players are complaining.  They say it feels like they are playing in front of children.  I was thinking these grown littles must be very good actors to make others feel like they are violating the "no children" rule.  I mean they are consenting adults.  

What I have a problem with - is a little more complicated (I think)  I wonder about the "daddies" and "mommies" that feel the need to play with children.  I have great trouble wrapping my head around getting turned on by changing diapers or cuddling a 4 year old or discipling a 4 year old (or whatever age the little is playing at)   Could be because I spent most of my career rescuing children from abusive homes - shrug - I am not sure.  BUT in all fairness I wouldn't NOT play if some littles were there,



There are the "furries" 

Now they are a whole 'nother story.  These "furries" were wondering around the Buskers festival on the weekend.  I have no idea if they are actual furries - or just mascots.  BUT there are folks who dress up as animals and do their thing.  What I learned about them I learned from CSI ( yes yes the television show!!)  So I am definitely no expert on them.  But I have to admit "I don't get it". 


And now there is "worming" 

Wanna know more about worming??? Here's a link - read it if you dare.  I believe I first read about this on Hermine's Heart - but I couldn't find it when I went back looking (I really should jot down urls when I am gonna quote)   There is something just plain wrong with this..... never mind the possibility of passing along infections but - REALLY - licking eyeballs???!!!  and yeah I know it is in Japan not North America - but seriously how long do you think it is gonna take to get here??? I have visions (excuse the pun) of the next big workshop here in the Great White North being on "worming" .......... 

What is becoming of my BDSM that I love so much??!!!  (a bit tongue in cheek - so don't jump all over me) I just don't get it!

Our New Home - edited to add missing pictures

The house is pretty much finished - the only big project left are the back gardens and deck... So I thought it was time to share the before and after shots... 

Ready?? Here we go.............


This was their living room..............

 which is now our dining room..........

  
their dining room 

is now our living room 

 Their kitchen has been gutted

  and replaced by our new kitchen

their spare bedroom  

our spare bedroom

 Now I don't have (for some reason) a picture of their master bedroom - which was filled with a HUGE  bed and even bigger ceiling fan
W found the two original photos I was missing ..... So here's their master bedroom

 here's our master's bedroom

And the 3rd bedroom was filled with boxes when we saw it - so no pictures of it..... 
This room was their "office"

That room is now called my quiet room and here is a picture of it........................

And that's it for the house tour.  

Weekend Entertainment

There is always something going on in Kingston - ALWAYS!!  From movies in the park during the week - and weekly concerts outside City Hall - food fairs last weekend and this weekend it was the Buskers Festival.

Never heard of Buskers ??? Street performers... clowns jugglers musicians you name it they have it.

Saturday was the meeting of the sub group at 1:30 - and I really wanted to get a taste of the Buskers!!  Going downtown during the day would be insane - the heat has been unbearable!!  So I had this brain wave of going to see some of the Buskers Saturday - late afternoon - after the sub meeting and staying in town for dinner.  I invited W on a "date" (one day I might explain this "date" aspect of our new contract/negotiations)

We had a really good sub meeting - the best one yet  I think!!  The topic was stolen from a discussion on Fetlife "How do you identify"  and then "Make it a verb"  So if you identify as a sub - you would state that - but then you would have to describe what it is you DO to make you a sub.  Because so many folks use the drop down menu on Fetlife - go eeny meeny miny moe and pick a role - sub slave - Dom - Master etc and give little or no thought to what it actually means/involves. The discussion was quite lively and interactive and thought provoking.  I gave the afternoon a "gold star" 

Then once I had politely kicked the last sub out.... W and I headed downtown.  The downtown core was packed!!  We wiggled and squirmed between huge groups of spectators and made our way up and down "main street"  These Buskers quite literally perform on the street - with no stage or seats for spectators.  We had done our research on all the Buskers and were looking for "Kilted Colin" whose publicity cited him as a bagpipe playing kilt wearing juggler and unicycle rider.  

And we found him !!

I am guessing he performed for about 20 minutes - using some willing and not so willing participants from the audience.  The funniest "helpers" were the 3 young men - who were forced to wear kilts over their shorts/pants.  One of the young men was NOT impressed with the whole idea at all................

The Grande Finale was Kilted Colin playing the bagpipes while he juggled two sharp knives........ and stripped off his kilt to answer the age old question "What do they wear under their kilts??"

After the show W and headed off to Sir John's Ale House for dinner.  The restaurant was in (if anyone is interested) Sir John A MacDonald's (the first Prime Minister of Canada) law offices.  We sat out on the terrace and did a lot of people watching - and praying for a slight breeze to cool us off.  Good lord it was hot - even at 7 at night!!

Then we wandered down to the docks so W could eye ball the navy ship that was in.... and we could catch some more Buskers.

Finally the crowds and the heat got to us and we headed home.  

Sunday Sentiments

W shared this pic with me - and I thought it would work for a Sunday Laugh...

Adjustments

When we first talked about trying this 24/7 - W and I - we agreed no more fantasy land - no more trying to do it like everyone else - no more reading what's on the internet or listening to others... we would do it our way.

So I arrived 2 weeks ago - and right from the start I was gonna cook and clean and be the perfect subbie - earn my keep so to speak... make W proud.

Well yesterday W sat me down and talked about groceries - simple enough discussion - right??? We weren't jiving on what should / was being purchased for food.  I was trying to make different interesting meals every day - despite the heat - despite being worn out - despite everything... " a good subbie cooks for her Master" right?? 

(le sigh)

I had fallen into the old trap of comparing myself to other subbies/slaves.  I had to do it the same way - I had to do it "right".  

Except - it wasn't what W was looking for.  

As he explained to me - He has simple needs when it comes to meals... plain food makes him happy... and easy to prepare food makes him even happier cause then I am not slaving away in a hot kitchen - or over a hot barbeque.

For some reason I cried over this.  I had tried too hard to please him and in the process hadn't given him what he really wanted.  And stupid me -  I fought him a little bit on this idea.  'cause I was so caught up in doing what was right!  Then the penny dropped and I thought "my god - W wants simple easy to prepare meals - am I crazy??!"  And I remembered the vow we made - we'll do this 24/7 OUR way !!

So re-align - re-adjust and cook simple easy to prepare meals that make W happy.  Truthfully it will make me happy too - cause as much as I love cooking - I only really like to cook from time to time... easy throw together meals suit me just fine!!

ummmmm now let me think - if I spend less time in the kitchen cooking - then that means I won't be worn out - and I will have more time and energy for fun things.... ummm sounds like a plan to me (cheeky grin) i will spend that time making sure the toys are aligned and at hand and that my ass is poised and ready.... yup yup yup... sure sounds like an adjustment I can adjust to (cheekier grin) 

Good Changes - edited

As much as I hate change - there are some changes that I welcome.... like changes in our lil home... making it ours!

Ordalie has asked to see some pictures of the new house - and as much as I am waiting for everything to be done - I thought a few shots of some of the changes might be in order.  

Over the last 10 days we have been busy working on the outside.  I have had appointments with contractors for a deck in the back yard - and (after digging out the front garden - and realizing I am not 20 anymore) contractors to put in some gardens in the backyard.

The garbage can is in the back yard on the left side of the house - and W has to drag it from there  to the right front side on garbage days.  And there was no pathway to drag this monster of a garbage can!!  let me tell you - in winter it was a "bitch" of a job.  So W has been in discussions with contractors to put in a new sidewalk on the opposite of the house.  That job was completed this week.  AND I have to say I love the new sidewalk - it seems to balance out the front of the house better.

Here's a shot of the new walkway..........

Now the front garden has been my project.  For some strange reason - the folks who lived here before us - filled the garden with all manner of plants.  No logic to their placing - there were tall ones in the front - spreading and taking over - and pretty small ones in the back.  There was a wild rose bush that was out to attack any unsuspecting arm that came near it...And to make matters worse - they had covered all exposed earth with large rocks.  Maybe it was an attempt to create a rock garden?? I am really not sure - but it was ugly.  

It took me two days to dig all the rocks out and to transplant all the plants and one bush.  The wild rose bush was dug up and put in the compost heap..nasty thing it was!! A garden flag was added and I felt better about the appearance of the front garden!  Hopefully by next year the transplanted plants will fill up and out and the whole thing will be a mass of colour.

Then - when we bought this place - there was a tent on the front porch - fancy name was Gazebo - but it was a TENT!!  It served a purpose all winter - keeping the snow off various bits and pieces that hadn't found room in the house........... but the winter snows and winds wrecked havoc with it and come spring the frame had collapsed......... so down it came.  

I have to admit I didn't shed one tear - the tent blocked the light from the dining room window and made the inside of the house so dark all the time.  Now we just have a nice deck - with a red umbrella (not in the picture). And W got to install his flag pole.  He has always wanted to fly a flag outside his home....and now his wish has come true.  (It might be noted here that one of my tasks is to make sure the flag is put out first thing in the morning and is brought in last thing at night) 

BEFORE 

 AFTER

Finally - I have added some stepping stones from the front deck around to what will be the back garden.

And that is about it for the changes I am ready to share ..............

Addition:

This morning I was filling the "trough" that was left on each side of the new sidewalk and W went off to get me more earth.  When he got back he showed me a picture he had taken of a garden statue......... I was in love and had to have it!!  So before lunch I ran to the local garden center to get more earth (who knew the damn trough was gonna eat up so much earth!!) and while I was there I snuck a peak at the statue.  It was perfect and I knew exactly where it would go......... at the top of the stairs to the front door to greet folks......... 

Here is the picture of the new "greeter"

don't tell me you were surprised by Confucius??!!  The oriental feel/theme of the house will be carried from the inside to the outside :)