The renovations on Sir's house are underway ........ and believe it or not ( i couldn't believe it ) they are gonna work on Saturday !!! So i won't be seeing Sir until Sunday.. and the Grey Cup Game.
BUT i won't be that bored this weekend.. i have decided that i will probably drag some - if not all - the Christmas decorations upstairs and decorate the house - that is most definitely NOT a hardship for me......... well except maybe putting the outside lights up.... i think i will leave the tree.... for now. The grand kids will be coming to spend a Saturday with Sir and i .. while their mom and dad go finish off the Christmas shopping...and it would be fun to decorate the tree with them........... i love watching Sir and the eldest struggle to put up the lights !!!
But none of that is my dilemma.............
and i am hedging here.. trying to find the best way to word what is going round round in my head.........
First off .. a submissive is supposed to tell their Dominants any and all problems they are having......... right??
But what if the problem is something the Dominant expects them to handle??? a task let's say..that they are expected to work through and get done??
Now i know if i tell Sir my dilemma He will most probably take over and do it.. fix it so to speak........ but then i will feel like i failed Him.....
Now if i don't tell Him the problem..... and do the best job i can..... i will spend more than a few days sweating bullets.. worrying and stressing...........
Oh and in case you are all totally and completely confused.. this "task" for lack of a better word is something i am capable of doing.. it's just the thought of it scares the hell out of me.. it may be the one and only area where i am a "broken sparrow" sort of sub.
i am finding out .. real fast.. that after 7 years of being slave to Sir.. of turning everything over to Him.. that my weaknesses have grown into life size monsters, that do indeed hide under the bed and scare the hell out of me.
So .. folks.. do i suck it up.. cope with the stress and worry and just do IT.......
Or... folks.. do i tell Sir.. know He will come to my rescue (probably reluctantly) and i will for eternity feel like i have failed Him.........
what do i do??????????
There are two key phrases that would seal the deal for me and make me at least attempt to do whatever it is on my own.
ReplyDelete"rescue (probably reluctantly)"
and
"i have failed Him"
So, yeah, we're supposed to tell all and whatever, but... only up and until "telling all" becomes a burden? I struggle with it too, sometimes. But really, at some point, it stops being a method of communication that helps them know all of who we are and starts to become a crutch for us to use when we "don't wanna". Does that make sense?
Certainly, I'm not saying that's what you are doing or that your Sir feels the same way about it. He may very well whomp-a-lomp on your ass if you do this alone without talking to Him first. They're all so different, yanno.
But that's where my "bouncing ball" took me today after reading your post. :-)
kaya
you know what the rule is about knot telling Sir everything and what will happen to you....
ReplyDeleteSir,
Owner of you
Tell him! if you want to handle it then tell him how you will handle it but tell him as you are a good slave and respectful of his wishes.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Cloud.
ReplyDeleteWork through it ...
I have no opinion.
ReplyDeleteI'm of the "tell him" persuasion. If your problem is that you think you should do it yourself, then make that part of the explanation. As in: "Can you help me figure out how I can accomplish this task so that you'll be proud of me?" or some such.
ReplyDeleteUpton
Is whatever it is that big of a deal?
ReplyDeleteI'd be inclined to be on the "tell Him" side of this discussion. I'd likely include the information that I want and intend to carry out the instructions to the very best of my ability, but that it is creating serious stress and anxiety -- He really should know that, so He can make a decision about the level of stress He's willing to have His property undergo.
ReplyDeleteUnless you really believe (in your heart) that telling Him is about getting Him to "let you off the hook," I'd opt for sharing the emotional side of this "whatever-it-is."
swan