on mind games

i have been a "bad" subbie. But i can explain it all away.. honest i can !!! Sir bought me a new collar - black leather approximately 1 1/2 inches wide with an O ring dead center. i love it.. honest i do !!! The first night i wore it it felt amazing ....... for all of an hour. And then my mind told me i couldn't breath. My mind told me that the collar was rough and irritating. My mind told me it was way toooo hot in the collar. i asked for permission, and it was granted, to change back to my chain mail collar (see earlier blog for picture). Sir decided that each evening i was to wear the new leather collar for 2 hours .. from 8pm till 10 pm. And i did that for exactly one week... then i stopped. BAD BAD subbie !!! But then Sir never mentioned it so i didn't fuss.

Today i got an email.... He had noticed and He wasn't pleased. Punishment .. put the collar on for the morning while i clean the house. Every hour i am to masturbate to orgasm and text message Sir telling Him. ummmmm now that doesn't sound TOO bad... an orgasm an hour till noon??!!! 9:20 collar goes on .. i go to the bedroom to masturbate. PROBLEM! collar feels too tight on my neck.. it is too hot.. it is too stiff.. i can't breath .. and i am supposed to ORGASM under these conditions??!! One orgasm one text message.. back to cleaning.. my how time flies when one is having fun! 10:20 time for next orgasm... only this time the collar is much tigher.. much stiffer.. much hotter... orgasm is not fun now... ughhhh.. done .. text message completed back to cleaning.......oh yeah did i forget to mention - no washing between orgasms so now i am sticky and wet and a bit musky smelling?? 11:20 time again! ok this is most definitely NOT fun anymore.... harder and harder to orgasm.... i try all the old tested and tried fantasies but they have trouble getting through the messages going on in my mind - collar tight.. collar hot.. collar choking.. one small orgasm.. ok that counts .. text message and back to cleaning. Only now one eye is on the clock watching it tick down the minutes till 12:20 ( i am guessing that 12:20 will count as noon ) and the cleaning looks a whole lot more appealing than it did at 9:00........... 12:20 try on my back, on my stomach, standing up one leg balanced on the edge of the bed, sitting, standing, dancing around... thinking all the while why did i ever think subbies who had this type of punishment - masturbating - were lucky!!! this is not fun.. really hasn't been fun from the get go...... concentrate.. no not on the collar !! concentrate focus .. one wee small orgasm.. that counts.. text message.. relief!

the power of mind games ...............