On Sunday evening after a dinner of turkey and wine and apple pie we were sitting with our friends in the living room talking about anything and everything.
I was deep in conversation with the friend sitting beside me when I heard a snap of a finger... and immediately without thinking ... I turned and looked at W. He laughed and turned to the friend he was talking to and said something - I am not sure what and it isn't important to the topic. He obviously was demonstrating how he used to summon me.
Since Sunday I have been thinking about that snap of his fingers - and another discussion we had the same evening about humiliation and degradation play. I had declared how I could NEVER stand that sort of play.
But have been wondering - if I was (and obviously still am ) trained to respond to a snap of a finger - isn't that a bit humiliating??? a bit degrading?? a bit like being treated like a 'thing'???
And I used to love it....... I thrived on it.
So perhaps on some level I did engage in humiliation/degradation play..........something to think about ........
Interesting. We've had discussions on this topic recently. Degrading Pet does not interest me personally. However I believe that humiliation (while it sounds evil) can actually have a positive spin depending on how you personally define it. Remember that the word derives from 'humility'. I don't perceive being humble as a negative thing.
ReplyDeleteJust my 2¢.
I have this same debate often (if you can call it a debate when you're having it primarily with yourself...) I do not like the idea of degradation play (I can't even watch TV shows where people get embarrassed...) and yet so much of the play I do in my partnership - the puppy play, elements of watersports, elements of objectification - feel inherently humiliating. Not sure where to go with that, just my two cents :)
ReplyDeleteI just realized Sir's comment above was his two cents too... I guess you have four cents now! :D
ReplyDeleteK8 that wasn't my Sir - talk about confusing - you should have heard the conversation here...LOL He kept saying he didn't have a clue what I was talking about.... it would seem there is more than 1 Sir online - go figure LOL
ReplyDeleteFunny.. Sir and i were just discussing this very thing the other night. When we first got together humiliation was a hard limit, i was clear. i do not get off on being humiliated or degraded.
ReplyDeleteBut...
This is the type of humiliation play i enjoy and respond to. i call it 'light' humiliation. my limits prohibit anything that makes me feel ugly (eg. being called a pig), or make me feel like less human. To me, responding to a snap, kneeling (which in the vanilla world could be viewed as humiliating), being called 'My slut', some watersports and such are part of my service to Sir. They give me the feeling of being owned and put me deeper into my submission. In my little world, that's different than say defecating outside, being used as an ashtray... things like that. Those to me lower my value as a person.
Perhaps we get to caught up in labelling and defining everything we do. If something makes us happy, and doesn't hurt anyone... then do it. Screw the labels and just be who you are.
~s