Vague thoughts

i woke at 3 this morning.... the house was cold - cause my furnace... my brand spanking new furnace installed only 8 weeks ago and never been used.... refused to come on yesterday.. oh joy oh joy!! And it turns out there is gonna be problems with the service call... they want to charge for the service call???!!! i was so angry (again - it seems to be the theme this week- my being angry) a service call on a brand new furnace??? never before used furnace??? My choice was freeze for a couple of days while the condo association sorts it out.. or order the service call and tell them to send the bill to the association... Guess which one i picked ??!!

So i am lying in bed at 3 am freezing.. when it hit me .. my throat is really .. REALLY .. sore.. my head aches, my nose is running and my chest hurts. Oh joy oh joy!! One of the many bugs floating around school has taken up residence in my body. Which shouldn't really be any surprise considering how stressed i have been all week.

And then i was breathing this huge sigh of relief that Sir had decided we would take a "time out" this weekend and each of us get much needed chores down at our respective domiciles........... and i am wondering how much i am gonna feel like doing considering how crappy i feel............

And then ...... i am just lying there .. letting my addled brain flit from one thing to another.. when for some reason .. i started picturing other people's sessions.. other people's rationale for playing.......

We have this friend.. who when he is domming.. seems to love having a reason to punish his submissives. Don't get me wrong.. He has never come out and said "I LOVE punishing my slaves" but he does get a gleam in His eye when He discusses it.. and on all his online ads he is very clear how He punishes.

i was remembering back to a time when he had a submissive who was.. shall we say.. not in the world's best shape. He assigned an exercise regime for her... and if she didn't follow it she was punished.

i was thinking about her - for some reason - as i lay shivering and aching in my bed in the dark this morning.... and i wondered how well that would have worked with me. i didn't have to think very hard or very long..... i would have told him where to shove his theories and his punishments.... cause ya see ... my weight has always been this trigger......... no happy memories attached to my past diets..... and so it is a definite sticking point for me.. and yeah i would have been less than graceful or gracious if he started on his "this is what you will do every day for 30 minutes " routine..

and then i got to thinking maybe that was the only way He could rationalize whooping someone's ass.. as a punishment. Many doms seem to have the same rationale......... and then i was remembering when Sir was just starting to whoop my ass.. and He seemed more comfortable doing a punishment session than a play session.

And i was wondering when the real transition came about.... from gleeful punishment sessions (and my being a real brat to instigate one ) and the playful sessions we now have.. ones where Sir gets that gleeful look in His eye... and i know my ass is in for a good one............

And in the middle of the wondering when the change took place..... i drifted back off to sleep.......

i guess it wasn't really important to remember that....... it was all just vague thoughts at 3 in the morning, when the furnace doesn't work, and the body is screaming SICK.