Wednesday, June 18, 2014
Yesterday I tried to write a blog on random thoughts I have been having. And for a number of different reasons I just didn't do it.
One of the problems was ....I couldn't seem to pull my thoughts/emotions from inside my head and get them out here........ just didn't happen.
I have been examining (in my own lil head) the differences between a wife, a roommate and a submissive. (Sounds like the opening line to a good joke doesn't it?? But it's not - and it's not even close to being funny)
I realized I might be able to live with "wife" - but roommate?? Nope - the thought of roommate was breaking my heart. But then when I looked closer at "wife" I realized that was breaking my heart too...
The only role I know or want is submissive.
My world was spinning out of control -- again.
And then W beat me - with leather floggers and leather whips. Beat me till I sobbed - loud heart wrenching sobs. And somewhere in the middle of the beating W's mouth close to my ear asking " Who loves me?" and my answer "I do" and then "why do you love me" and I answered "because you beat me" Familiar words - said so many times before - a mantra of sorts........... a way of picking up the pieces that were my world - putting them all back together again... setting it back on its axis and start it spinning once again........
All was once more right with the world....... I am not "wife". I am not "roommate".
I AM submissive!
day 35 of 365