The Reality is...........

I have been thinking (for a number of reasons) about sub frenzy.  Ya all know what I am talking about - or you should.  It's that time when you discover BDSM and all your fantasies suddenly become a strong possibility and you run around like a chicken with it's head chopped off trying to live all those fantasies immediately.  Remember now???

This sub frenzy is in reality a wonderfully exciting place to be......... 

BUT the reality is.................. 

You can't be chained to the bed 24/7 - nor can you live in a cage - nor can you ignore the vanilla world 24/7.  Life on the outside of your fantasies still goes on.  There is still food to buy - doors to answer - family to look after - meetings to attend......... the mundane every day world is still there expecting you .. yes YOU ... to contribute.

I believe there is also a Dom frenzy of sorts.  I don't know much about it - except what I have witnessed.  (so I could be wrong - not likely - but I am putting it out there just the same - I could be wrong).

Dom frenzy is the thought of having some mindless lil thing kneeling at your feet waiting to do your biding.. hanging on to every word you say..... laughing at all your silly jokes ....... blindly trusting you...... following you around like a happy little puppy dog, tail wagging, thinking you are some sort of GOD. 

Dom frenzy is in reality a wonderfully exciting place to be........ 

BUT the reality is.......... 

You can't play GOD 24/7 - it is bloody tiring. In reality it is hard enough to run your own life never mind running someone else's.  You can't be dressed in leathers all the time - wielding a whip and sounding stern and domly all the time.  Life on the outside of Your fantasy world still goes on........ bills to pay - car maintenance - work - family to look after - the mundane every day world is still there expecting you ..... yes YOU ....... to contribute.

Never mind health issues that afflict both sides of the fence - dom and sub.  It may be difficult to believe when you are a 20 something or 30 something dom/sub.  BUT life has an amazing way of sneaking up and slapping you upside the head when you least expect it.  Health issues are the great fantasy destroyer.  (trust me on this one) 

And when the time comes that you can't be the mindless kneeling sub chained to the bed doing his bidding 24/7 OR when the domly body starts to age and things just don't jump to attention like they used to - or you spend more time trying to get the energy up to flog that subbie's ass than you do actually flogging...... You realize reality is bigger and stronger than that fantasy you have been desiring.

Now the challenge becomes finding a middle of the road BDSM lifestyle that actually is based on reality not fantasy.

Of course there are those that refuse to let go of their fantasy world - and continue to run around like chickens with their heads chopped off - playing at being submissive or dom.  But take a look - those folks aren't doing it 24/7 - nope they are doing the real life face to face only occasionally.  They rest up for it... they train for it... they play it for a couple of hours or so.  Then they run back to the safety - the REALITY - of their worlds and curl up on the sofa and turn on the television or the computer and sigh a great sigh of relief that they can be themselves.

I say............

I would rather be my subbie self with all the complications of real life.  I want to be REAL.  I want to build my BDSM world on the reality of what I can do in reality - not try and be something I am no longer.  

And I believe that by being REAL - I will be the best submissive anyone could want.  I believe that by being REAL you will be the best submissive or dom you can be......... and in my world REAL wins hands down over fantasy every day.