Hardest Part

I honestly didn't believe I would miss LLF as much as I do.... 

At the beginning I would think how lucky I was to have him in my life -- to see him regularly for the whole weekend.... to sleep with his arm wrapped around my body holding me close -- making me feel safe and loved. 

At first when he left I knew he would be back and that was enough -- there would be hours and days to spend together -- to fill up my heart with him to last me until the next time.  

At first it wasn't hard to say good-bye.

And then it was hard......... it made my heart hurt... it made my eyes fill with tears....  it made the days between our visits stretch endlessly -- empty and cold.

The hardest part is watching him leave...........