I have received a couple of comments that I have decided not to post - I hope the commenters will forgive me. But honestly I don't want to upset W more than I have already........right or wrong ... W is still the man who filled my life with joy and laughter and love for 15 years.
And as Reaperscreature said on "Maybe" you really only do have my version as to what has gone on here..words coming from pain and hurt....SO.. it really isn't fair to judge W based on that. In his defense he has been by my side through the good times and pretty awful beastly times - the medical tests, the surgeries, the pain, the fear...he held my hand and my heart.
Since the "Maybe" blog - W has given me back the money he promised and has moved to the other bedroom. I went looking for apartments (again) and yes I did find one - a very nice one - in a residential area - all clean and sparkly - BUT - I am not ready to give up on THIS relationship - roommates and friends - without giving it a damn good try!!
I am hoping that we can find our way to roommates and friends. To finding the laughter and the joy together again. You know the very first thing I really liked about W was how he could make me laugh!!
OH we will never be Dom/sub again - never be lovers again - but being friends is a good place. and I would like to see if we can get there again.
And there you have it.. an update....
I found it very difficult to go from lovers to friends after a 2 year relationship, I cant imagine 15 years... however, it is possible - keeping you in my thoughts
ReplyDeletesugarsack
Love can change the darkest of times to joy. Have faith. :-) N
ReplyDeleteI hope so too. I hope that the two of you can make it work. I will keep my mouth (fingers still) and just pray.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you did and love your compassion in this.
ReplyDeletexo mini me
You my dear lady are a class act! I fully believe that the two of you will find that space where you can be good again. 15 years is a long time, there are hurts and happiness that only the two of you share and it would be a shame to lose those. I'm so thrilled to hear that the two of you are working towards friendship. Love is not like a switch that you can just turn off the instant a relationship is over. This is someone who has supported you and seen you at your worst, that alone makes it worthwhile to try to maintain a friendship. Your blog has always been a place for you to explore what's going on in YOUR head, i think we're all (or at least i hope)adults here and capable of understanding that this is, and has always been about YOUR journey, not a place to attack him, if someone wants his side of things i'm sure he's more than capable of sharing with them if he wants to. Like i said, we're all adults here, we all know that there's a hell of a lot more to all of your life that we don't see :) Huge HUGS lady...for both of you.
ReplyDeleteDaddysvera