Wednesday, April 23, 2008

How to........

What advice would you give to the submissives online who are looking for a master?

i am not the least bit sure i am the one to give advice on how to find a Master online - considering the dismal success Sir and i have had in finding another submissive on line. i have such mixed feelings about online anything.

i have said so many times online you can be anything - anyone you wish to be. And online can become such a fantasy world. AND i believe that some people even began to believe they ARE this online persona.

i would think that finding a Master online should pretty much be like finding one in real time. i would look for someone who interests me.. holds my attention.. is fun to chat with, knows how to laugh, and has a good heart. i would look for someone to be a friend first, a lover second, and a Master third. i would look for someone who is consistent in all things... who takes care of his belongings - be it car or house - with love and if he has older parents or children - who shows love and patience towards them. i would look for someone who has a joie de vie that matches mine....... a desire to socialize and be with friends.... and who enjoys his quiet alone times equally as much.

i would expect this prospective Master to not be in a hurry to "cut to the good stuff" - to want and need to get to know me - the ins and outs of who and what i am - as i would want to get to know Him. i would want to see the tender manly side of Him before i deal with his domly side.

AND i would use my instincts to feel the domly side within him - how he deals with life's challenges - with confidence and an air of authority.

Those things are as important to me as the BDSM things....... can he throw a whip?? hold a flogger?? does His checklist of "do's" pretty much match mine....... does He understand how to take baby steps in pushing limits, does He have the patience to take baby steps in pushing limits??

All of this learning about - getting to know - doesn't happen in a day or a week...... and in my opinion happens more truthfully face to face than online.

And this - dear readers - is just my opinion!


  1. If I may , for online shopping for a Dominant or sub it is like bait fishing. Put a tender morsel not too much just enough to attract the type you want then cast the line and like Huckleberry stretch out for a long nap with the line between your toes and wait. That has been sucessful for me though in clubs and munches i have done much better.

  2. I don't have an opinion but I enjoyed reading.


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