Saturday, April 07, 2012

Tough Old bird


I've always said 'I am a tough old bird' ... it's not something I want to be - or that comes naturally to me - but I have had to learn to be one to be able to live my life.... 

I have always felt pretty much alone - even when I was married - maybe more when I was married - cause in marriage you are supposed to have someone to lean on right?? someone to share the joys .. the problems.. except most of the time i didn't.  I toughed it out on my own. 

The family (extended and immediate) always turned to me to fix things - to make things right.  

When I finally stood up on my own two feet and decided I would be the 'tough old bird' just for me  - I would take care of myself - by myself - for myself - I moved out and moved on.... 

It hasn't always been easy.  There have been lots of time that I wondered if I hadn't bitten off more than I could chew.  But I have forged ahead ....... tripped and fallen a few times - scraped my knees - but I always just got up and kept going.

As much as the future scares me - scares the hell out of me - I AM a tough old bird - and I know I can do this....... for another year - or forever if that's what it takes.......

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