This blog is intended for adults only. It may contain BDSM content from time to time.
Tuesday, August 16, 2016
Blondie's question
On Sunday Blondie left me a question and I decided I would answer it publicly today
If you have any ideas / opinions then please feel free and use the comment section.......
Blondie said...
okay, I have a question for you. I have to give the example first though.
So there are two couples, Bob and Barb and Jane and John. These two couples are really close, not just as friends but as neighbors. Plus they are all very involved in the fetish lifestyle. Bob and Barb are happily married, they have older children (only a high schooler living at home). He is a retired cop and she has some side business she runs out of her home. The other couple, John and Jane are also happily married, retired, no children around and they have their own dungeon. John is also Jane's Master. They are all into the S/M dynamic too and will have fun, whenever they want in the dungeon.
The thing is, John is also Barb's Dominant and not her husband's. He is her top, plaything, wife, etc. And even though Bob is very dominant, there is not a D/s relationship in that house. And I know that he is very respected as a top and is Dominant in that role.
They seem to all be happy with this relationship. What do you think? It is something that would work?
Personally I like the idea.
Blondie -- I am just gonna repeat your question to make sure I understand it ......
John is Barb's Dominant and Jane's husband/Master. Bob does not appear - in this scenario you gave me - to be domming/topping anyone. You want to know if I think John could top/dominate both women - Barb and Jane?
I am confused because the way you stated the situation - it would seem that he already is domming/topping Barb. And I assume it is working...... AND (big assumption here) I am assuming that Bob knows about this relationship.
If everyone is open and straight forward about their needs/boundaries then it should work very well. The only suggestion I would have is that the two women talk or negotiate. When Hands and I were negotiating one of the things I wanted was to talk to his wife and ask her what HER limits were for me -- was there anything that was not allowed. For example some wives don't want intimate kissing. I was amused by his wife's answer -- she kinda giggled and said she only had one HARD limit on what Hands did with other women -- but that she didn't have to worry about it with me. That made me really curious -- what would I not do that could be hard limit for her. Turns out her one hard limit was Hands wasn't to get anyone pregnant....... and as I am well past having babies it was not a problem.
Experience has taught me that it is always a good idea to talk with the primary partner and hear from their mouth what is ok and what is not ok.
Other than that -- I say go for it........ though I must admit to being a little curious about how Bob fits into this -- if at all.
Anyone else got any ideas - comments - suggestions - questions?? feel free to use the comment section.
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ReplyDeleteWhat was the question again :)))))))))
ReplyDeleteI was confused by this should it say she is his plaything, wife etc?
ReplyDelete"The thing is, John is also Barb's Dominant and not her husband's. He is her top, plaything, wife, etc"
and this is it about Bob?
And even though Bob is very dominant, there is not a D/s relationship in that house. And I know that he is very respected as a top and is Dominant in that role.
Well they are all best friends, wives and husbands. John is the Dominant of Barb and he is the Master to his wife/slave Jane. Bob still has a lot of fun because he is a spankee and a lover (kind of). At parties, he kisses and hugs on girls before and after beating them. And his wife is okay because the kisses are sexual. Bob just spanks everyone! There is a very tight knit little community, that we are just becoming part of. All of the people know each other outside of play too. I think that I would like something like that. Ty is the Head of the Household but he isn't a Dominant. He is a spanker and a voyeur. So it would all work if it ever happened here. But I am too new to the whole thing to do anything but watch and be spanked, flogged, etc., by Ty.
ReplyDeleteThanks for answering the question here and not on Fet. And thanks to all of you for your comments.
Explorer, I didn't know how to make the question simple for Morning Star. Bus I was hoping that with her experience, she would be more knowledgeable than myself. Thanks!