Wednesday, June 20, 2018

A Bit Introspective








I know most people look back and assess their progress -- I have been doing that over the last week or so...... 

The changes here at Sir Steve's bogel my mind ..........

Just over a year ago when I moved here -- the lil one treated me like an intruder... the food I cooked examined as though it was poisoned.... my ideas of tidy bedrooms a new concept (for the most part)... this was a child who was stuck around the age of 3 and yet she was going to be 5!   Slowly the toddler dishes and cutlery disappeared as did the plastic cups...... 'she was a BIG girl now' was my war cry ....... the TV was turned off at meal times -- and then slowly her time watching it was reduced to 1 hour and a half a day.  She learned to amuse herself -- to play by herself.

Now when we sit down to meals she gobbles up her meals -- declaring dinner 'delicious' (except when I try to sneak bell peppers onto her plate) ...... she uses a knife to cut her food and is working on spreading toppings on bread to make her own sandwiches -- she drinks out of glasses and eats off the dinner plates -- she sets the table and clears the table without a blink of an eye.... she feeds the dog...... her baby talk has almost completely gone...... Last night -- much to my surprise she took her elastics out of her hair herself and took the braid out...... wow!!  Her dad said 'you're my lil girl' and she said seriously -- 'NO Dad I am a big girl now!'  

We have all been working on her reading and math skills.  Her report cards have slowly been improving....... and last week she brought home an Award "Star Reader" ... I was soooo thrilled -- and the best part ... she said "I am proud of myself !" (another quality we have been working on -- to recognise internally the job well done -- not looking to outside sources for validation)

Tomorrow is her graduation from Kindergarten.... her dress is picked out -- she has new sandals and pretty little socks and a special dress.  I am not sure who will be more proud or more emotional -- her father or me!

And Sir Steve........ 
Just over a year ago -- his heart was deeply hurt.  I felt he was struggling with his own self esteem -- confidence....... 
I supported him while he pursued his dream..... I stressed over it ... lost sleep over it... but knew HE had to do it his way.......... I also learned quite quickly how much the other women in his life had altered the fun of sex......... there were so many ways to try and help him I almost didn't know where to start....... 

Around the end of March his dream faltered - badly.  Giving him time to think it through -- to see the reality -- I initiated the talk....... time to step up to the plate...... and he did........... oh and I know it hasn't been easy for him....... (we all have dreams we want to live) but i am not his other women -- I have high expectations for him (just like I do for his lil one - grinning) He seems to be on track now....doing well confident and strong the man I used to know...... 
I have pulled back on some of my 'parenting' of the lil one pushing him forward to take up the slack.  It's time.

It's wonderful to see this family coming together..... last summer the lil one and I called this family the 'happy kingdom' and now I can honestly say it IS a 'happy kingdom' 

Life is good when progress happens and a happy kingdom evolves

4 comments:

Baker said...

Love the progress even though it's been a long process. Sweet reflective post.
--Baker

NoraJean said...

Happy for you, Morningstar ... it was a difficult journey but so good you can look back and see how far you've come ... nj ... xx

keth said...

I see a lot of reflecting on how the lil one and Sir Steve have changed because of you, which is great, don't get me wrong, it's lovely to read! But what about how you have changed because of them? As you say to the lil one, where's your internal validation of how well you've done? Even if you don't post it/share it here, I think its still a very useful process for you to do.

Roz said...

Hi Morningstar, this is a wonderful reflective post and wow, look how far you have all come together! So happy for you :) Enjoy the graduation :)

Hugs
Roz

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