Sunday Sentiments

SURPRISE !!

Tomorrow is Sir Steve's birthday.  Youngest daughter - a few weeks ago - invited all of us to her place for a pool party and barbecue.  Secretly I contacted her and the eldest daughter to plan a mini surprise birthday party for Sir Steve.  

Then his parents said they wanted to come visit for his birthday....... le sigh....... they wanted to come on Saturday -- but have agreed to come tomorrow.  So I got to plan 2 birthdays for Sir Steve .......... how could I not??? if I wanted to keep today's party a surprise.  

So I have ordered 2 cakes -- one big one with dragons for today and a smaller one with a football theme for Sunday.  The lil one is so excited for these birthday parties....... she made her dad (with my help) a plaque that says "You Rock" from salt dough and small rocks from the road outside our trailer....... we baked it and sealed it and it's all wrapped up for Daddy.  I bought him a samurai that he's had his eye on -- and being the sneaky conniving woman I am I had it sent to youngest daughter's house!!

Life is good when you can celebrate with laughter love and family !





 

OH SHIT !! OH SHIT !!

Picture this if you will............

9pm Monday night -- Sir Steve and I are sitting on the deck enjoying the sunset .... and Sir Steve says " go to the bedroom - strip naked and lie on the bed"..  (why do I always get the giggles and feel shy when he tells me that?!)

Not 5 minutes later found me naked and on the bed as ordered.  

Sir Steve started spanking my bare ass........ slowly at first then building up speed and intensity........ god it was amazing !!  I was squeaking "OH SHIT OH SHIT ... fuck fuck fuck !!"  He never missed a beat......  I know I had 2 orgasms just from the spanking.. and it felt as though my world had been righted on it's axis once again....... 

Life is good when THE man spanks my ass....... 

No More Rose Coloured Glasses

I have been off the evil drugs for 2 full months now....... and had a follow up appointment with my doctor on Monday.  Truthfully I was dreading it...... I had such anxiety about it -- and the worst part was - I don't know WHY I had anxiety.  (have been having a lot of that recently - anxiety for no good reason)

Have I told you all how much I love this doctor??!!  I really have lucked out with finding excellent doctors since I moved to Ontario!  

He asked me how I was doing and I said "the best way to explain how I am feeling is -- it feels like I have taken off my rose coloured glasses....... and I don't much like it".  And I told him how I am not sleeping well........ hell I am averaging about 3-4 hours of sleep a night........ I am an 8 hour a night girl and without that I feel like crap.

He sat and listened and really made me feel like he was hearing me.  He explained that even though I have been drug free for 2 months -- the adjusting is far from over.  I was surprised and asked 'how long for the adjustment period?' He smiled and said that everyone is different so there was no firm answer -- and considering how long I was on the drug it would take my body a whole lot longer to adjust......... I have to be patient -- and gentle with myself.  He said he could offer me something for sleep -- but as the 3 drugs he is willing to try can cause some dependency issues I said NO -- I am done with dependency issues/addiction issues. He suggested I might want to try melatonin and I am considering it.......... BUT I have hope renewed cause I am not finished adjusting ....... who knows the lack of sleep might just sort itself out.

The doctor also told me he saw a marked improvement....... I was surprised!  He explained my body seemed more relaxed -- I wasn't fidgeting as much -- and I appeared calmer......... WOW colour me shocked it sure didn't feel like things had improved!

He then recommended a program offered here in Ontario that is for folks dealing with anxiety / stress brought on by drug withdrawals and or life.  Believe it or not it is an online program....... I go fill in questionnaires and they set up work sheets/reading material for me....... I do it -- they evaluate and send both myself and my doctor the results.  It's kind of a 'heal yourself therapy' AND as I have had therapy more than a few times in my life -- and the one that worked the best was my healing myself -- I am seriously considering doing this program....... who knows? it can't hurt and it might just help.

In the meantime the doctor is fully supporting my meditating and colouring and doing some yoga........ He will see me again in 2 months but told me not to be the 'hero' if I need to see him before then - just call!

Life is good when there's hope and light at the end of the dark tunnel.....  

Fun Times

The week ended on a very positive note......... though Sir Steve says it feels a bit like we're living in an alternate universe.  Let me explain......... 

Last week the lil one was determined to learn to ride her bike without training wheels by herself..... it was hot and exhausting BUT she did it!!  On the road to success - her grandparents (who haven't spoken a nice word to us in 3 years) came out the first day on the road to watch her and cheer her on....... the second day the grandmother came and stood with me and chatted a bit about how well the lil one was doing...... by the 3rd day the lil one was successfully flying up and down our rocky back road ....... the grandmother came over to our trailer and started chatting about the lil one's mother and how fed up she was with how lazy her daughter was..... how she told said daughter she was not going to raise the lil one........... and then started telling me about some pretty sad events in her time as a 'mother'.  During this conversation she actually broke down in tears !!  I was flabbergasted - she actually allowed herself to be vulnerable with me!  Since then she has smiled at us as she goes by - and calls hello.....  alternate universe for sure !!!

Sir Steve and I - and eldest daughter and son-in-law - went to the Rib Fest on Saturday........ 

we pigged out on ribs and pulled pork and finished up with mini donuts.

I got a henna tattoo just for fun........

I actually managed to come home with a lil heat stroke........ sigh........ and went to bed with a sick tummy and spinning head and sore muscles.

Sunday morning though I was much better and Sir Steve and I went on a 'brunch' date.  The food was amazing and I admit I pigged out again......... BUT I didn't have anything else much to eat all day so not too many guilts (grinning) 

Life is good when you move to an alternate universe and people come together....