Thursday, April 30, 2009

Clothes make the ........

One of the abiding rules for public play clubs is a dress code - Fetish Wear.

i remember the first time i heard that expression - i had no idea what it meant. And being a curious sort - when i don't know what something means i ask...........

And i was told.

The list was long .. everything from latex to rubber to leather - oh yeah and cross-dressing. i spluttered... i stammered... i choked. But i didn't have any leather or latex or rubber .... could i cross-dress as a male??? No - that wasn't exactly what the expression meant.

i could wear black....... basic black - maybe ............if it was appropriately skimpy and slutty looking. Needless to say i didn't go to any public clubs - ok ok... not many. There was one that didn't have a strict dress code - and IF you knew the owner (which i did) you could get in in something less than the normal dress code.

i eventually weakened and had a Story of O dress made for myself - or a version of one... somewhere in the multitude of pictures i have there is a picture of this dress.. in fact i think i may have already posted a picture......... but i couldn't find it.........

The Story of O dress - for those that have no idea what i am talking about .. is a dress that can look like any long evening gown....... but (in the case of my dress) a tug on the ribbon running through the bodice and the breasts are instantly exposed...the back seam running from the waist to the floor is actually fastened with velcro - so one easy rip and the back is completely exposed.

That dress cost me a month's salary or more....... but at least it allowed me entry to more public clubs.

Then along came Sir......... and He took me in hand.. and took me shopping. He was gonna have His lil subbie decked out in fet wear so that all the clubs would admit me.

Now just a brief editorial comment here...Cloud asked in yesterday's comment section if i would have felt differently if these had been Sir's fantasizes not mine. The answer is simple - probably NOT. They would have been done more often.. maybe even continued to this day..... but it would not have changed my mind about them. This dress code is a prime example. Sir had no trouble envisioning me dressed up slutty.......... i had / HAVE / a huge amount of trouble seeing myself dressed in this manner !!

We purchased that day.......... black slinky see-through "stuff" .. black thongs (my god i HATE thongs - i hate feeling as though i have a permanent wedgie!!) black thigh high stockings, a garter belt, and even a corset.

The only good thing that came from these "get-ups" was the fact that whenever i went out in public in them i hung back - just behind Sir - kept my head down and blushed to the roots of my hair if anyone noticed me or spoke to me !! The clothes most definitely did NOT make the woman - in this case. BUT they did keep me in the most submissive pose imaginable - i barely spoke, and almost never looked at anyone boldly.

Now i have asked myself - if i was a 20 something with a nice lil body and perky lil breasts - would i have felt more at ease in the Fet Wear. The answer was a simple no. i was raised to believe that women did not dress to show off "their wares" and i was most definitely doing that !!! i am - for the most part - a shy woman - and a proud woman. i do not see myself as a "slut" ........ as a floozy (as my grandmother would say) ........ and the clothes felt odd on my body - my reflection made me squirm and very uneasy.

i once debated with Sir .. and probably Cloud too - as we are the best at debating issues of the community over coffee.... the value of having one's sub dressed like a slut - when she wasn't a slut - wasn't going to be offered as a slut - and how could Sir (or any Master) take pride in the world thinking she was a slut??

And wasn't the whole purpose of going to a public club to be hung from some equipment or other and flog or whip or cane or tie and bind - not to look like some fashion statement from some goth magazine - or some hookers listing??

Now Sir and i rarely go to public club events anymore. The new standard of s/m had/has moved in - the stand and model. i remember one event i went to .. at the very beginning of this stand and model phase......... where one submissive came in decked out in the most elaborate latex outfit i had ever seen !! so elaborate .. so tight.. so breath taking ..... her Master had her sitting on a piece of equipment for the entire evening - perched like a pretty delicate piece of porcelain to be admired but not touched or used.

i don't want to be some pretty piece of delicate porcelain when Sir and i go out to play....... i want to play! i want to feel the whip bite into my skin.. i want to feel the cane burning ........

And so it has come to be that even Sir is not all that interested (so it seems anyway) in my looking like some tramp He picked up on a street corner. He wants someone He can hang from the ceiling and beat..... He wants someone who can stand just behind Him .. head held high - proud to be who she is.

So clothes do indeed make the subbie............. IF they are the right clothes - and not some one else's fantasy of what a submissive should look like!


  1. now, I have a completely different attitude towards 'dressing up" - I used to LOVE it - in fact one of the first things that hooked D. was my delight in sexy clothes - I never ever wore pantyhose- always stockings and garters. I loved short short skirts and the ultimate "treat" for me was to drop a bundle on underwear - it was a real "weakness" - not speaking of flashing breast or crotch or anything - just wearing sexy slightly outrageious clothes - which I did regardless.

    I lost my desire for those for a long time during the children years and a body that was busy with pregnancy, breastfeeding, kids and never enough time ...

    but I yearn for those clothes again and have even "picked" an outfit from northbound leather which I hope to buy IF I reach my goal weight and size by my birthday or shortly thereafter -

    What I do agree on is comfort - I have no interest in wearing sexy clothes that I can't move in - I love boots - almost obessively - and I like them high heeled and long - but they MUST be comfortable, Imust be able to walk and wear them well - same with clothes - like them slightly outrageous but COMFORTABLE and workable - not interested in dressing up where I can't MOVE.

    In my case, the clothes DO make teh subby- it makes me feel sexual, desirable and out there - NOT as I said to the extent where it is vulger -- but treading the line ....

  2. Well for subbies and bottoms it does give them some purpose I guess but but slaves, I preffered my slaves naked seems simpler . What do they need clothes for anyway just gets in the way of natural beauty.

    I have never seen an ugly woman but i have seen some garrish dresses!

  3. I have a deep and abiding dislike, contempt even, for almost all dress codes. That dislike has nothing to do with the attire.

    I/we dress the way I/we dress. If someone doesn't like it or wants to exclude us from association - well, fuck them and the horse they rode in on.

    That's what I think.

  4. I agree with Buff ... I detest dress codes.
    I dress how I WANT.
    Some days it's a skimpy little black lace dress, garters, stockings and of course, heels.
    Other days it might just be a silk pantsuit and heels.
    ALWAYS heels! They are a requirement in my world.
    Not 24/7 ... I DO wear t's, shorts and the like.
    No matter, I dress for me.

    I say, whatever makes YOU feel confident, proud and/or sexy is what you should stick with ... and to hell with what anyone else thinks!

  5. By the way, The Story of O dress is spectacular!

  6. Oh there you go...making me feel good about sending that email a couple of months. Big hug!!



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