The darkness was deep........... I was lost in it.. in the darkness..... not quite alone but almost alone. I heard growls and knew they were coming from deep inside of me... I was facing a challenge.. no.. more than a challenge ... a dreaded adversary
The first however many hits were teeth rattling ......body arching .. foot stamping ..cursing hits. But there were the individual ones.. the ones that made me clutch at thin air, grab for something solid... made my breath catch, and world shrink way down........ to a spot........ those were the worst.
I knew the challenge was two fold.. to accept and ride the pain.. to claim it... to make it mine! and the challenge to find my limits......
I was down to one finger holding on........ body weak and sagging... no strength.... too much....... ENOUGH !!
I may have cried out... I know I turned.. I know I begged... the wall was there and my body was hitting it and hitting it.. like a battering ram... and it wouldn't come down... ENOUGH!
And then he was there ........... pulling me tight into his body .. holding me tight...repeating.. "you are ok.. you are safe" I was crying.... and he held me tighter soft lips brushing against burning skin, the words "you are safe.... you are ok" locked forever in my brain.
A moment caught in time.
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