Some are curious what protocols are.. and why we have them. Maybe if i substituted "manners" for protocols it would be a whole lot clearer...... i am not sure. What i am sure is that over the years of playing at public clubs and playing here at the house with friends..... that people seem to have some skewered self centered ideas about how to behave during a play party.
For example......... Sir and i were at a club where people crowded around Sir and i chatting away .. oblivious to our "scene" going on... people actually tried to have discussions with Sir while He was warming me up...... others stood in the direct path of his whip........ and all the "excuse me's" did nothing to deter them from their quest to be unmannerly bores. In fact the worst of the worst came in a dungeon where a male followed Sir and i down to the equipment of choice and proceeded to masturbate in front of me! while Sir played with me....... i was shocked and totally turned off by the whole evening
Here at the house when we hold play parties i am always amazed at people's lack of plain old fashioned manners......... i have had a subbie who actually got angry because i wouldn't let her come in the house with her snow covered salty boots.... people monopolized the play equipment as a social area with no thought to others who might want to actually use it for playing....... subbies sat on the furniture naked without the benefit of even a towel...... oh the list is endless.........
One friday afternoon.. during our weekly coffee klatch with Cloud.... we discussed the need for "House Rules" for our parties. It seemed ridiculous but if i was to save my sanity..... and get to enjoy our parties.. we needed to lay down some ground rules.
Simple rules really ......... like:
* submissives are to help with the serving and cleaning up
* Doms are to be respectful to uncollared submissives
* the large play equipment is to be cleaned following use
* the private toys hanging on the walls are NOT to be used
* submissives are to take care of their dominants and their toy bags and any other paraphernalia that they bring into the house
* no drugs
simple rules that we call protocols.. i really find it a wee bit disturbing that we must set the rules to paper and send them out with any invitations....... but it seems that life / society has changed to the point .... that manners or protocols have gone the way of the dinosaur.
More's the pity.
Now THIS is what I find shocking!
ReplyDeleteI honestly 'thought' that these basic "rules" would be understood by all parties involved.
I mean, that is just common courtesy in my mind.
Surprising how manners are lost but not surprising that you need house rules for other reasons.
ReplyDeleteAs we all play so differently so what is acceptable in my house may not be elsewhere thus the need for rules.
"that people seem to have some skewered self centered ideas about how to behave"
ReplyDeleteYes, I deliberately left out 'at play parties'....its been my rather sad experience that for admittedly only a few people I've come across, this extends to life outside play parties too.
These days, manners, courtesy and respect seem to be considered 'old fashioned' values...I, for one, can only hope that like many other things, they will come back 'into fashion'.
love and hugs xxx
I saw this right after reading your entry and thought that it fits in the vein you're venting about.
ReplyDeleteIt's also downright hilarious.
http://community.livejournal.com/dot_bdsm_snark/279076.htm
I think too that those "rules" are basic respect... Having to tell people to not use your private toys is quite something... Who could have thought they will?? And sitting naked on yout furniture is quite gross...
ReplyDelete