i have a feeling that my post over the weekend "Just say NO" concerning (mainly kaya's blog) but included Finbar's from Fet Life and my own personal opinion raised more than one or two eyebrows.. even though it only raised one comment from pet.
i have been down the safe word road more than once on this blog.. and many many times in relief life..... and i have debated the "safe sane and consensual" theory about as often.
For those of you not up to speed... here's where i stand very simply.......
i do NOT believe in safe words - if someone has you tied up and comes at you with a buzz saw - do you really believe saying "purple alligator" will stop them??
i do NOT believe in the safe sane and consensual bull hockey - anyone and i do mean anyone - who believes we are sane to want our asses walloped - or needles stuck in or our bodies cut should rethink the definition... and as for consensual welllll folks when my limits are being pushed i sure don't think consensual........
No ........ i sorta kinda think R.A.C.K. is more appropriate....... but trust me it still has a whole mess of holes in it........
For those of you who don't know the angram - i even found you a reliable definition:
"Risk-aware consensual kink" is a term that was coined in reaction to current dissatisfaction within the BDSM community regarding the political issues (internal and external) surrounding the " safe, sane and consensual" ethos that many people define consensual BDSM. Specifically, RACK is intended to embrace edgeplay and play that is engaged in without safewords.
Now getting down to the real issue at hand..... is it my job to protect the innocents that come here to read?? is it my job to worry about the frenzied subs and Doms who might read here and decide "oh wow I am going to try that !!" without benefit of practice or book learning or a workshop or two?? Never mind some years in the lifestyle..... some real life experience.
NO - it is not my job pointe finale.
This blog is mine...... i can talk about all the issues i want to.... i can discuss sessions with Sir that involve knives and cutting.. or needles.. or whips and chains and floggers and i should NOT have to worry that some poor fool will come along and take my blog as law....... take my blog as being SAFE..... or SANE....... or for that matter ....... CONSENSUAL.
This blog is for adults only....... so is kaya's blog.. so is Finbar's ......... and if adults do not have the good sense God gave earth worms..... then so be it. i am not going to lose sleep over something i write ..... worrying that some green naive wet behind the ears subbie (or Dominant) might run right off and try it. We are all responsible for our own safety .. our own sanity and our own consent.
THAT is why .. i always preach (yes preach) that multiple play partners is not always a good thing......... that meeting some stranger in a motel right from on line is not a good thing....... which is why i always preach YOU need to build up trust with the person who is going to tie you up and give you all your fantasies.... you need to know deep down in your heart that they are not going to maim you or kill you......... YOU need to have trust......... not blind trust... but good old fashioned trust........ (and remember the old adage.... 'be careful of what you wish for' )
There are so many aspects ..... different facets....... of this lifestyle that there is bound to be one or two that you will come across that will make you squeamish make you want to run a mile....... and that is good!! you know your limits and you know which Dominants to stay away from and which ones to grab onto.......... but do not .. i implore you....... put down someone who believes in and enjoys and relishes edgeplay......... (that definition i am gonna let you all look up yourselves - take some responsibility damn it !!) that is what this blog is about - taking responsibility for yourself ....educating yourself....... and realizing that there are some out there that are gonna play a whole lot harder .. a whole lot differently than you ever could.
It would be nice if we really could rejoice in each other's kinks...... but barring that.. and barring accepting their kinks....... just laissez faire....... let them be.
and for those of you who dropped by to read about our weekend.... check my Yes Miss Blog...... andrew came to visit this weekend.