life is a great balancing act.

i came to the realization a few weeks back, that i had to switch my priorities... the ones i had were skewered.

i had come to the realization that i had this fantasy land of BDSM in my scopes and it was what i was striving for... i had this long list of ideas/plans/fantasies that i wanted to experience/ live and it wasn't happening and i was getting VERY antsy.

My dear friend drakor has been writing about his ideal session.. his ideal Domme recently. It was his writings that made me realize i am not alone in this quest for some Utopian BDSM. It has been nagging at me most of this week. Mind you .. what drakor is seeking is a short term involvement with "no strings attached". A weekend or a week at best. Sir and i have been to a BDSM camp for a long weekend.. it was very easy to live D/s.... BDSM to the fullest when you are in the middle of nowhere land - with no obligations - no phones - no tvs - no computers.... just living for each other.

Is it easier to commit to a full time BDSM relationship when there are no other expectations or obligations?? The answer is YES..of course it is.. lose yourself in the wilderness with a whole group of other like minded people... BUT remember just beyond tomorrow the real world awaits again.....

And so .. for me.. life has become a great balancing act (to quote a favourite author) and in between Friday night canings.. and Saturday's chopsticks cutting into my private pink bits making me ache .... and long.. and wet.. and putty in Sir's hands.. there is Sunday Mother's Day.. and a host of other demands....... really what it all boils down to is..........
as Dr Seuss said:

So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that life’s a great balancing act. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.) KID, YOU’LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

teacher's pet

After a week of school... somehow it seemed so appropriate that Sir would decide to use the "canes" for our Friday evening session....... "teacher's pet" i call them.. the trio........

The top cane (looks like a regular cane) was purchased on a fun BDSM rally / treasure hunt that Sir and i organised a few years back. The goal was to follow a map that lead to a flea market..... once at the flee market the task was to find a BDSM pervertable toy for the lowest number of bucks. We found and purchased the walking cane......

This cane was used last night as an "attitude adjustment" .. i was wired from work.. a bit snarky - very tired.. and not so very submissive in mind set...... a dozen strikes with this cane put me quickly into my place..




The middle cane was something i heard about - long before we ever found one to purchase. On a chat program i used many years back, i sat in on a discussion between some BDSM folk from the Carolines (if memory serves me right) discussing the pros and cons of a "cane bundle". My curiosity was peaked and of course i had to ask what a cane bundle was.. and where i could find one !!! It was a few years later that a local craftsman listened to my description of cane bundles and created a prototype. Needless to say....i HAD to have one. It can be as sensual as Sir wants it to be...... or as wicked as He wants it to be.. i discovered the joys of both modes last evening...... the sensational use of the bundle had me wiggling my ass.. almost begging for Sir to .. ummm.. finish the job He started.. (and i am NOT talking about the caning!!) oh lord that cane bundle can get my blood pumping !!

Because i love this cane bundle so much .. and the work that went into it .. i took some close up shots of the important bits.........






And finally Sir's newest cane - what i call the School Master cane....... now this lil bugger stings like the devil. There is a method to caning.. one that has gone round the net and round the community forever.... i am not entirely sure if it is the correct method....... BUT let me describe it for you....... and believe me when i say.. it works for me !!

First - all swipes of the cane are done in sets of 6 - no more no less. (why i do NOT know!!)

Second - It is best to hit with the cane ...... let it rest against the hit mark for a fraction of a second then lift. What happens to the subbie is two fold...... the initial hit compresses the area (ouch ouch ouch)..... in that fraction of a second - the warning is made clear - when the cane is lifted off, the skin bounces back (in a manner of speaking) and the pain sears .... it much worse to handle than a wham bang thank you ma'am sort of hitting method... slow methodical .. sets of 6 ..




When Sir was finished caning me.. i was laughing and waving to my fairies ...... and not entirely focused on anything of consequence.. so when He gave me permission to leave the position.. i just kinda flopped down on my ass... i yelped.. my eyes bugged out .. and my ass ached........... ohhhhh what a glorious feeling.. what a glorious end to a teaching week!!!

baby steps..

Last night as i tried to find a cool spot in the bed - a breath of air - i wondered what the devil i did before Sir. Let me explain..........

When i first met Sir i could not .. under any circumstances ... be naked. i even wore a robe to go from my bedroom to the bathroom! Sir was bound and determined that if He taught me nothing else (remember this was in the beginning and it was not supposed to be a long term relationship !!) He was going to teach me how to be naked... naked as a jay bird.

i balked.. i screamed HARD LIMIT!!! Sir quietly and calmly replied "baby steps". So the first thing i HAD to do was learn to sleep naked... oh i could still put a robe on when i ran to the bathroom, but in bed... nothing.. zilch .. nada.. naked!

Slowly i progressed .. until i could walk around the top level of the house naked IF the blinds were closed. As i lay in bed last night remembering ... i remembered the night i was walking to the bathroom to have my nightly bubble bath. As i passed the "office" i noticed i hadn't closed the curtains. (Now to fully understand the impact of this story, you have to picture the windows in the office. They are NOT your typical bedroom window - small and squarish. No sirreee bob!! They are floor to ceiling windows. ) Completely forgetting that i was naked (wow!!!), i walked into the room and closed the first curtain. As i reached to close the second curtain, i realized to my shock and horror that i was standing .. framed in the window (light behind me) in all my glory!!! You never saw anyone dash behind a curtain as fast as i did !! and then try and reach across the expanse and manage to close the other curtain. i was horrified. It set my "naked training" back more than a few "baby steps" .. trust me !!!

And so as i lay sweating in the bed last night...... i had to wonder .. what did i do pre nakedness??? how in heaven's name did i ever sleep in pj's in such heat??!!! Oh .. Sir knows best.. and He has proven it more than once !!!

quickie

Sometimes.. all i have in me is a quickie (cheeky grin).. Today is one of those days...

First .. for those of you who showed an interest in the urls for the "subbie handbook" check out the links on the right side.. i have added a new section.. appropriately named.. "subbie handbook"...

Secondly.. i have managed to get myself in gear again and am back on the treadmill.. (here me groan??) and while i have been walking my way to boredom.. i have been watching one of my dvds on geisha....... why do i tell you that?? because i have posted some oriental pics to my Photo Journal (link also on the right hand side)

now i am off to twist and tie myself up in knots with my yoga........ and then hopefully outside.. to dig some winter out of a flower bed or two.......

Cabaret

Saturday evening (after my nail adventure of the afternoon) we had a cabaret to go to.. we didn't know what to expect from the evening.. it was a fund raiser for the 78th Fraser Highlanders.. and it was their first attempt at a cabaret. We weren't expecting much.. especially when we saw that "poetry reading" was part of the evening's entertainment........ BUT.. much to our surprise the evening was enjoyable.. cold.. god it was cold.. The event was held in the old powder house of our historic fort (powder as in gun powder). A while back the powder house had been turned into a quaint sort of theater - for live plays. i loved the thick stone walls and the narrow windows ... you could almost feel the history in the building. And after the show - walking back to "civilization" through the trees .. beside a stream.. one could almost imagine the pioneer days... feel them watching you..... it was a fun evening !!



a view from one of the windows in the theater lobby


the theater lobby.


This weekend was truly our very own cabaret - from hot wax and knives on Friday to the quirt on Saturday and the Grande Finale was being strung up from the chains on Sunday afternoon.
Whips and floggers and chains oh my !!!!

In the picture collage at the end of this post are just some of the toys that Sir used on me over the weekend (i was blind folded on Sunday so honestly truly i am not sure of all the toys.. ) BUT take a close look for the chain flogger.. Sir rarely if ever uses that toy on me.. it is kept in the freezer and is more a mind fuck than anything else.. (i do so HATE cold) ....apparently the chain flogger was left downstairs and was readily available to Sir. Though it wasn't frozen - it was ding dang cold (from the coolness of the basement i guess) Sir put the handle of the flogger between my legs.. used the chains to pull it tight into my private pink bits.... ohhh how i complained and whined and pouted and even .. i think.. stamped my foot... COLD is just so unfair !!! BUT that didn't deter Sir.. no sireeeee !! He got this wonderful idea .. (did i say wonderful??!!) to insert the handle of said chain flogger into my pussy... and i was told to hold it there and not let it drop.

Now ladies and gentleman...... picture this if you please.........

The handle is made of slippy acrylic.. it is freezing cold ... and inside me.. INSIDE i say !!.. then to make the challenge even more interesting.. Sir picked up some of the more evil toys we have and went to work on my ass.. the backs of my thighs and my breasts.

i didn't drop it......... i don't know how i didn't.. but i didn't. i cried when Sir removed it - why i am not entirely sure.... from relief i think. i hadn't dropped it. Of course i was thoroughly rewarded with a good fucking and orgasm by this same flogger ....

Yup..... Life IS a cabaret ole chum !!!