Well I guess my toothbrush dates are over.
I got a "dear john" email yesterday. Apparently he didn't feel there was enough "chemistry" between us.
HUH?? seems to me there was too much chemistry and not enough of the ordinary stuff.
Ahhhh well - back to the drawing board I guess.
He wasn't a keeper, but he was sensitive, patient, sensual, well-endowed...and definitely a good choice for testing the waters. Your instincts are good. And you learned things, and sometimes that's enough.
ReplyDeleteKeep that toothbrush handy, your kinky lover is still out there!
Inquiring minds want to know: did you get laid before Mini-me? :0)
Actually... I think this chap may have been just what you needed.
ReplyDeleteThink about it.
before you met him, you were doubting whether you were attractive to anyone. whether you were still working right, whether you would be able to have sex, whether you would be able to have sex with someone outside of a relationship, whether you would be able to move on from W.
You now know you can do all of those things. And best of all, you've done so without falling into a heavy relationship. Right now, I think if you were to find another prince, then questions might be circulating through your mind like, "is it just a co-incidence that one man finds me attractive". This way you find out that it's not just a co-incidence, and you'll keep growing, so that when you are ready to be in a relationship you'll be far more independent and *ready* to be in a relationship than you are now.
I went straight from a bastard frog to a prince with just a few weeks inbetween. I love my prince dearly, we've been together almost 15 years, and i don't regret being with him. but he was a rebound relationship (just one that happened to work out), and I can recognise now, with the benefit of hindsight, that in many ways, not being alone for a while robbed me of the opportunity to grow and develop independence, something that I've had to learn to do within the relationship instead, which is actually much more difficult.
So. yes. I think this chap may have done you an inadvertent favour with this dear john email... and, I may be wrong, but I don't get the sense that you're majorly upset about this either. Which says a lot in itself - I think weeks ago you'd have been devastated by this.
Back to the drawing board, yes, but more importantly, don't allow this to derail all the progress you've made. Learn from it, and move onwards and upwards.
You can do this. you have this. :)
@Alofa Yes she did. Dammit!!
ReplyDeleteI like what Keith said. It was a good experience in many ways. Him sending a dear John letter not so adult but what can you do? You've been giving a gift of knowing you are still a vibrant and attractive women whose libido is as strong as ever. I know you are reviewing this in your head. Be kind to yourself and make sure you separate what he did wrong versus what you did. You did nothing wrong that I can see. Embracing your sexuality is a good thing - you and I both struggle with our duel good girl ways (the traditional and the BDSM good girl).
Love you - mini me
Some guys fall more in love with the chase, and once it's over it is hard for them to feel chemistry or remain interested.
ReplyDeleteOn the plus side, you had fun, he was a gentleman, and even though he sent a letter, which is not the bravest thing to do, at least he didn't just ghost on you.
I just can't understand that dear john letter after such a week-end, it's baffling!
ReplyDelete