Virtual life.....

i don't think i have ever done a blog entry on the "virtual world".......but i have debated the issue many times with a whole mess of folk........... so let me pull out my soap box and get started..........

A comment was made to me the other evening .. in passing.. about phone sex. i am not so "goody two shoes" that i haven't engaged in it.. i have........ BUT it got me to thinking about the whole "virtual world" some people live in.

The virtual world is a very safe world...... you never ever have to meet anyone.. you are always perfect in the virtual world.. perfect body, perfectly long thick hair, perfect temperament, perfectly made up, perfectly clothed (or not - as the case may be). To me the virtual world is all smoke and mirrors... you can be whomever you wish to be on any given day... you can do the impossible in the virtual world. It is a Never Ending Story...... a fairy tale with happy ever after endings.

One of my biggest shocks and disappointments (many long years ago) was a web site i had found that stocked (in my opinion) the very best articles on BDSM.. had journals written by both the Dom and the sub on their life together.. it was intense and extreme and made me long for such a life. And then i met someone in the real world who dispelled all the illusions i had about this Dom and his sub and their web site... they weren't a couple.. they hadn't ever met for god's sakes. They were a virtual couple. The site was basically compiled by a man who was happily married to a vanilla wife in the real world and had built this enormous fairy tale world for himself on line. i was beginning my education about the virtual world!

i even tried the virtual world of BDSM.... now that was an adventure!! There were always "Masters" on line ready and willing to "play" .. to order a submissive about. i tried it.. and went oh wow how boring is this!!?? For me anyway.... it was all smoke and mirrors.. the orders given could be followed or not who would know?? and what about safety?? too many times i was ordered to do something that common sense told me just wasn't safe....... did i do it?? No bloody way!! but i can write a good story...... and i did.. many many times. And know what?? i betcha the "Master" was writing a damn good story too............ while his wife cooked and cleaned in the background and his kids did their homework.

Smoke and mirrors i tell ya.. all smoke and mirrors.
Did all this story telling get me hot and bothered.. yeah it did..... it made me want/crave/desire even more the real world of BDSM... a world where someone would whip my ass and put bull clips on me and not let me cave in when i thought it was too much.. it made me crave the touch of another human being. Living in the virtual world is a dark lonely world in reality. The sun comes up in the morning and the fog and mists of the fairy tale world dissipate quickly.

That is not to say that Sir does not use the internet to give me tasks... or (at the very beginning) to train me. BUT we already had a connection.. we knew each other in the real world... The internet was used to fill in the time when we could not be together......... it was not our world only an extension of it.

And what about phone sex....... the casual comment that started me off on this soap box lecture?? i tried it once..... ok ok maybe twice.... and i never did see the draw of it.

Picture this with me for one second.. the phone rings.. you answer it.. this soft voice on the other end starts talking about all the things he would do to you if only he was with you...... you are balancing the phone between your shoulder and your ear..lying on the bed... playing with yourself.. trying to loose yourself in the voice and the words.. He asks if you are getting wet.. he wants to hear how wet you are so you put the phone down near the pussy with one hand and with the other you try and create slopping sounds loud enough for him to hear... BUT if you are like me - a two handed masturbater - it doesn't work all that well.. and the "feelings" start to wane....... now you can't even hear the soft words being spoken so how do you know when he is talking to YOU.. he lands up talking to the sloppy pussy for a few minutes longer than he thought........... phone back to the ear and he continues in his mesmerizing voice.. telling you to get the vibrator or dildo...... and insert in pussy....... now i am balancing a phone AND a dildo and no free hand to play with ........ i am trying to focus on that voice .. and the vibrator and am trying to make all the right moans and groans at all the right times........

And then maybe if the stars are all aligned correctly i actually do start to feel the beginnings of an orgasm........ and oh god i know exactly what i need right now.. the voice on the other end hasn't a clue..... i need two hands.. so i try and prop the phone on the pillow now.. so i have two hands....... and in all the excitement of the moment (shall we say) i roll over on top of the phone..wrestling one lil pathetic orgasm out of myself......... and when it is finally over and i have found the phone again - usually buried under a pillow - or knocked onto the floor....... i pant a pathetic thank you to some stranger.

Trust me when i say...... if i need to masturbate....... (and yeah .. if i have permission) i don't need or want a voice at the end of the telephone line listening to my pussy slurping or my moans and groans...... i want my two hands free to tease and pinch and thrust and rub......... and if i moan i moan...... i don't need to worry about holding up my end of the deal - so to speak - and give this anonymous male some sounds to jerk off to.

And now i will climb down off my virtual soap box and continue with my real world that includes getting Sir's house cleaned for my all girl evening this evening...... hiding all the toys so the girls don't land up having apoplexy fits.

Oh yeah........ and daydreaming about Sir's weekend with me.. the last weekend of the holiday ...........