Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Hard Knock Life

"fuck it - it HAS to get better"

This morning I awoke with the song "The sun will come out tomorrow............." from Annie,  going round and round in my head.  I have no idea why - my god it's bleak and grey and rainy ......... but for whatever reason I believe the sun will come out ...............maybe not today - maybe not even tomorrow but it will come out.

I went to a munch on Saturday evening.  Now that in itself is not a big thing.  The fact that I drove myself to the munch - an hour and a bit away - and actually found the restaurant was a BIG thing.  That I had fun - and was cheeky - and bratty - was another BIG thing,   

But the biggest thing that happened ........ someone wrote me on Sunday and said "I was so proud of you" a simple sentence that brought tears to my eyes.  It's been so long since anyone has been proud of me........ and my submissive heart melted.. then soared.  It's stupid really that that line - from almost a stranger - could make me feel so damn good..........but it did.  It was food for a starving soul.

I don't know what lies ahead - and my OCD is raging - bringing bouts of anxiety that are testing even my limits.  But I am beginning to believe that the sun WILL come out.............   



Anonymous said...

I'm one of those long time luckers who doesn't have much to say. I hope things work out for you and you find some one who loves you for who you are. Stay safe

Anonymous said...

I've known you were headed to better days once things were out on the table. I know you've had bad days.....but you've had some really good days. They were absent before.

(raises a glass) here's to better days and more people (including me) of being proud of you.

mini me

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