Friday, May 06, 2011


Yeah yeah - I am doing a blog on 'R.I.S.K.' and 'Safe Sane and Consensual ' AGAIN!!  But stay with me here folks - there is point............

Two things contributed to my feeling the need to address this topic (once again).  There is a new blog out there........ "Ties that Bind Us" - clever title ......... Anyway for her first blog entry she defined "Safe Sane and Consensual" and then defined "R.I.S.K."   She stuck with the party line.......... as did I for a many years.

The other thing that prompted me to write about this ........ AGAIN......... was Sunday's brunch and a discussion we had about our "beginnings".  We talked about tight breast bondage - and needles in the breasts and nails in the breasts.  We all knew in our heads there was some risk to this practice............. but we didn't care ......... or didn't want to think about it.  (I think that is more to the point - at the time we didn't want to think long term - we were caught up in the moment - in the excitement - and didn't think past the next needle)

There are no medical studies done on the long term effects of some of what we do........ hell do you know anyone who would volunteer to be followed ?? Do you know any doctor who would want to apply for a government grant to study the effects extreme BDSM has on one's health in the long term??? AND even if there was such a study AND even if we all knew the results ....... would any newbie listen???

The one thing that came to light on Sunday - there were 3 women there (including myself) two of them had been submissives to Sadists early on in their BDSM days.  Both had had extreme breast torture.  AND both of them today have lumps and masses in their breasts (as do I) .......... we cannot prove that those lumps were caused by the extreme torture - but we can't help but wonder.

The other thing I have noticed - recently - though it has probably been going on for years - is more and more submissives are wearing medium to BIG butt plugs 24/7.  They openly admit it hurts almost constantly - they talk about fissures and sores and being stretched. 

When I was first starting out in the lifestyle...... I had a strict training........ and the one thing that was emphasized to me ....over and over ad nauseum .. was that ...... clamps should never be left on a body part for more than 30 minutes MAXIMUM - that blood flow was being cut to that body part ....... which is never a good thing.  30 minutes on.......... at least an hour off........ then one could reclamp.  Butt plugs should never be worn day after day........ muscles would stretch and eventually not be able to "remember" to retract.  It was pointed out to me how many gay males landed up in doctor's office with rectums stretched beyond human limits........ and the subsequent problems that come from that.  And that breast tissue (same as scrotum) was a delicate lace work of tissue and muscle and nerves that could be easily damaged.

I didn't 'listen' I went for the extremes.  And now some 20 years later I can't help but wonder what permanent damage has been done to my body.  I wish the younger newbies and the not so young newbies would pay attention......... because one day the damage will be done ......... and it will be too late.


Anonymous said...

I wrote an article on breast trauma and CANCER, it is sort of a rant, for breast play does not cause cancer (like some BDSMers think and preach) but ANY breast trauma can cause lumps (like what you have)

There are likes to verify all this from women's health care, to Susan B Komen etc.

Its a good read and will verify the yes trauma to the breast can cause lumps but NOT cancer.

Anonymous said...

argh typos not awake..need more coffee..

Impish1 said...

The problem with the breast lumps are not that they are cancer, they are not. The problem is that they can lead to extra biopsies, and also make it more difficult to diagnose cancer early if you have a great many of them or if a cancer "hides" behind or next to one. This can happen with any type of lump or bump or scar tissue in the breast, even from previous biopsies. More limps, more risk.

moonchildkitty said...

If only the government would give grants to study the long term effects of BDSM activities on our bodies! But it is true how many newbies would listen? I remember when I first started out I had NO clue between abuse and consensual pain. Learnt that one the hard way.

Buffalo said...

Well, (and needfully), said. With your credentials it has more impact and meaning. Coming from someone like me it is considered judgmental rather than do what you want, but realize there may be some consequences down the line.

Good job.

swan said...

I remember that, very early in my BDSM explorations, there was an older, more experienced submissive woman (a nurse) who told me that "The things we do are not safe, and anyone who tells you otherwise is lying." There are risks. We ought to be as fully aware as we can be. We too often are not that at all -- either because the needed information isn't available, or because the needs and drives we experience lead us to ignore what might otherwise be obvious. Too, we are prone to a sort of ill-defined and seldom talked about competitiveness that pushes individuals to "up the ante" to keep up with whoever is the submissive/slave/bottom/property diva of the day. It is an insidious game we play amongst ourselves.

The newbies won't listen. The newbie I was once wouldn't have listened either. The early, heady days of "finding" BDSM can be pretty wild.



viemoira said...

I think you give some very wise advice. It is so very easy to get caught up in the moment.

Kold_Kadavr_flatliner said...

Fact is, I’ll croak. You’ll croak. All of U.S. will croak someday. Don’t get so caught-up in this passing-world you lose your immortal soul. I gave-up my hard-won, black belt to fight for Heaven (I had a promising career in aikido/karate) What R you gonna give-up to rise-up? --- I'd so love to nekk with you in Heaven, girl, and this blog is how I'd love to serve you. God bless you.

Anonymous said...

you need to run screaming away from warren, i love that you are on your own he is what he is and he is controling, quite appealing to a sub but he is a dangerous man he does not want submission he wants to kill you and everything you are. I have dealt with him Please heed my warning.

morningstar said...

Anonymous - re the warning concerning W

IF you are SO concerned about my safety and feel you have information I don't have - then perhaps you could grow a back bone and say it outright - with a name! I don't believe anyone who hasn't the guts to say it out loud and proud (so to speak)

Don't want it out there for everyone to read - then email me.. that's simple to do.

Otherwise - find someone else to "protect" anonymously

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