Thursday, June 22, 2017
The other day my youngest daughter told me that youngest grandson was winning a special award today at school. It's not one of the "citizenship" type awards -- this is one of the 4 special awards --- the one where a letter is sent to the parents inviting them to the ceremony. This is a special award!! AND he's the first grandchild to win such an award.
There is no way this momentous occasion is gonna happen without proud granny sitting in the audience taking pictures -- nope no way at all!!
So I am heading off down the highway for the hour's drive to his school. What a wonderful feeling to be that close that I CAN just show up and share the special occasion -- all the special occasions!!
And that is a very good thing!
Wednesday, June 21, 2017
It's only been 3 days since I started unpacking the boxes. I joke that there are 3000 boxes -- actually there are only 30 boxes to be unpacked and 6 big rubber maid containers that hold my Christmas decorations... they don't need to be unpacked and are stacked neatly on the shelves in the basement.
BUT still - 30 boxes to unpack.
I actually got the kitchen unpacked on Monday -- managed to sort out where everything could/would go in my new kitchen. The house is quite old and the kitchen cupboards are HUGE -- and high.... so high I needed a step ladder to reach the top shelves. Needless to say the things I rarely used went up there.
The pantry like the cupboards is huge and high -- but it held everything -- including my bread machine, my huge silver chest and my red kitchen aide. I will need a step ladder again to reach the serving platters high up on the top shelf -- but that's ok -- I don't expect to be throwing any big parties any time soon.
I have unpacked my bedroom and got most of everything sorted out in there. That room was my biggest challenge -- much smaller than the master bedroom in the Kingston apartment. BUT I got the necessities in with a wee bit of room to spare.. can we say it's 'cozy' ?
And yesterday I got the spare room unpacked -- the printer found and hooked up -- my paper and art supplies safely sorted out in their baskets on the shelves. Also got most of the living room pulled together........ there's still pictures to hang and I haven't quite found my chinese village to display yet - but I am pretty sure it is in the last 'picture' box.
OH and the cable/internet guy showed up and got my internet and tv up and running.
BUT as much as it sounds pulled together -- the bathroom isn't painted yet and is in pieces ....... and the kitchen has all Sir Steve's painting supplies. The apartment feels a long way from pulled together yet..... oh and the washer and dryer have to be hooked up -- because I wasn't happy with the placement of them -- and purchased a washer dryer unit (on top of each other) .... it means poor Sir Steve has to find time to redirect the water supply. (I do love making life complicated -- le sigh)
I keep reminding myself it's only been 3 days -- and it's coming together.... soon it will be my lil haven..... and I will have pictures to share with you. For now I will keep trucking through the mess and organizing ......... soon it will be done -- soon.
Tuesday, June 20, 2017
I remember oh so long ago - unwrapping wedding gifts of sterling silver and cut glass crystal. I had 'good' dishes and 'good silver ware'. I had table clothes and cloth napkins. I had a formal dining room. I was given oil paintings and bought (strongly suggested) formal furniture.
When I lived in those days -- when I entertained in those days -- I felt like I was playing a role..... being just like my mom -- and making my father proud.
When I divorced my husband and moved on -- I still carried with me those standards of what a house should look like......... and I still felt like I was living in someone else's skin.
When I finally moved out on my own -- bought a little house -- all those 'things' came with me -- as did the mind set. BUT there was a little thought that was starting to form in my head -- just a little wee seed of a thought -- I would dearly love to have a mostly oriental design in my house. I added a piece here and a piece there -- they were barely noticed swallowed up by all that formality.
When I moved to W's house -- I added a few more oriental pieces. In fact one room -- my room -- was allowed to be decorated anyway I wanted. And the garden I created definitely showed lines of the oriental. The seed was growing.
When I moved from W's house to the apartment -- I tried really hard to have my oriental design........ without the formality. But it didn't quite work. Around the edges all that formality still existed.
When I moved this time --- I had made up my mind. This was MY house! I have grown so much and have been finding my voice... my strength... my style. This house was going to be my oriental design! (with North America comforts -- I'm old after all !)
Yesterday I was unpacking the kitchen boxes -- the formal dishes had already been given to youngest daughter -- the formal silver ware was tucked into a deep cupboard -- the crystal glasses and vases have been carefully stored away. In their place is simplicity and minimization. There is a chinese lantern (with electric light) ready to be hung just inside the front door. My oriental village will not be delegated to a back room or behind the glass of a china cabinet -- it will be on a table in the living room. There is no formal dining room -- just a simple dark wood table and two straight line chairs in white. There is a small simple set of drawers under the front window where my bonsai sits proudly.
This house is exposing more of who I am than any other house I have ever lived in. Simple lines .... a type of Zen peace. It is MY house reflecting the new me -- a quieter more peaceful me.
And that is a very good thing!
Monday, June 19, 2017
Everything from a strong hand around my neck -- to bruises on my breasts -- to sweet love making ..........
BUT the voices were still yelling in my head -- loud noisy confusing
Then last night when still I felt empty and lost ...... Sir Steve moved to sit beside me on the sofa -- wrapped his big strong arms around me and pulled me close -- head on his chest -- tears slowly running down my cheeks -- silence between us -- just his strength filling me up --
Then in bed we whispered in each other's ears -- and I could hear the voices silencing -- could feel the peace returning -- could believe that "we will indeed get through this together"
And as my eyes closed the last voice disappeared ......
Life is good when you learn you are not alone ... and that together problems will be solved.