Monday, July 31, 2017

Miserable Time


The most miserable time of my life was when I was in high school and bullied.  OH almost everyone has a story about being bullied -- I know!  I learned to withdraw and avoid and lock myself up safe behind high walls to avoid the pain they caused.  Then I left school and have managed to avoid bullies since.

Well that is until now.

Sir Steve's ex wife and ex inlaws are bullies....... sneaky back biting gossipy bullies.
They have called me a slut .. a home wrecker and crazy girlfriend.  I have ignored them.... 

They play games -- like this past weekend.  The summer arrangement is one week on one week off.  The exchange day is Sunday.  We had the lil one all last week -- she should have gone to her mom on Sunday.  We heard through the grapevine that mom wasn't coming back to the trailer till Tuesday ...... long story short the exchange was changed twice and we weren't informed of any of the changes.  They are trying to break us -- trying to get a rise out of us.  We are taking the high road and refusing to take their bait.  (I am documenting everything for the court hearing in Sept)

BUT it broke my heart when I heard on Sunday at the pool that the other cousin (an 11 year old who stays with the grandmother for the summer) has been told she is not allowed near me -- near us.   

I had noticed that she hasn't been coming to arts and crafts anymore and the one day she did show up -- she veered away from where I was sitting - ran into the building grabbed a forgotten project and beat it out of there like the devil himself was after her.

Last night Sir Steve and I went for our nightly walk.  As we came out of the trees on a curve in the road this cousin was walking towards us.  It made me literally sick to my stomach as she looked at us with these big terrified eyes and darted behind a tree to avoid us.  I wouldn't / couldn't let it go!!  I walked over to her and asked (with a big smile on my face) if she had been fishing.  She came out smiling and said her friend had fallen in the lake.... and then she wandered off.  

BUT the darting behind a tree made me ill.

And then we heard she has been told she is not allowed to go to any campsite if we are visiting there...... WTF???!!!  It might explain too why the lil one doesn't come to visit us during 'mom's week' .... at least not without our encouraging her to... Are we such ogres??? Have they stooped so low that they are now using children to get to us?? to hurt us???

It is the one black cloud on an otherwise perfect summer...

I have cancelled virtually all our 'adult' invitations for the summer as we never know when we will have the lil one and when we won't.  It's just easier ya know -- to cancel and tell Sir Steve I just didn't want to go..... cause he gets stressed trying to please me and dear lord he has more than enough stress on his plate without me adding to it! 

I don't know what will happen in September when they all go to court again to finalize the child custody issue.  As far as we know the mother has done nothing to lift the "supervised visits only" and yet she and her parents believe they will get full custody.  Sir Steve wants full custody and full guardianship.  And it would probably be best for the lil one.......... but the selfish side of me wonders what happens to our adult time if he gets full custody??? 

Life can be so complicated at times..... especially when you are dealing with power hungry bullies........

 

3 comments:

Blondie said...

so sorry that there are people out there like his ex-wife and in-laws. Hope the courts see through the games

Anonymous said...

I have been thru something similar to you. My children are all grown and college graduated and only then did issues cease. Someone showed me this online tool which might help (if only as a documentation tool). I can only say it probably won't get better but YOU can get better with dealing with it. Don't let it drag you down, none of it is your fault.

www.ourfamilywizard.com

Anonymous said...

Do be careful about what you write here. It is possible that they could use it against you. Feel free not to make this comment public, but I thought, this blog is so public, if they are aware of it, then they could use it to hurt you and Sir Steve.