Saturday, August 28, 2010
It was still dark when I awoke this morning..... feeling hands caressing my breasts.. feeling the wetness between my legs. I moaned and stretched.. wanting more of what this phantom lover had to give to my starving body.
I didn't open my eyes, I wanted to stay there in the wet warmth of the dream. There was a need - no, more than a need - an absolute craving for touches, for a hard cock between my legs. But there was no lover in my bed - only the hangover from a wet dream.
So I opened my eyes and reached for the toys that are always beside my bed... lifted the covers and brought the dildo down between my legs - teasing myself, closing my eyes, trying to find my way back to that phantom lover who had wakened me before the sun was up.
I caressed my breasts - running nails over them making them tingle. I teased my nipples making them hard and erect. I ran my hands down my body - teasing it, caressing it, arousing it even more. I did these things because there was no phantom lover in my bed.
And when it was over, this early morning release, I laid quietly thinking that somehow simulation of any event is never as good as the real thing. And it has been a long 6 months of sleeping alone, of phantom lovers and simulations.
For years and years and years I was told to never lie -- to always tell the truth ...and to give people the benefit of the doubt. AND to li...
I have been searching and searching for some sort of reason -- some sort of logic -- in all of this......... I feel like it is just ther...