a little broken

It happens sometimes.. i guess.. to all of us.... at some time or another.... but it has thrown me a little bit.........

Yesterday Sir ordered me into my tack bra and off to Cloud's house for coffee.. fine and dandy.. it felt rather nice to wear the tack bra (ok ok call me crazy!!) but it did !! little pricks reminding me of my place... a secret smile between Sir and i when Cloud's wife hugged me tight, or when i bent over to pick something up and the whole bra thing seemed to press tighter into me...

Then home and i was allowed to remove it... and dinner and the usual friday evening tv shows.. nothing out of the ordinary.. and then Sir ordered me up to bed a bit early - because of my topsy turvy week.. and because we have a busy weekend.. and because .. just because i was sleepy............ and as He bent to tuck me in.. having chained me to my side of the bed... His hand went under the covers and He got this wicked grin .. and His hand went to play with me.. and i murmured 'ya know Sir, the expression, "use it or lose it?" well i do believe that applies here'.. i felt no twinges.. no tightening.. nothing.... Sir wasn't to be deterred and He reached for a dildo - one that rarely sees the light of day.. 'willie' we call it .. and it wouldn't even go in!! Well ok Sir did manage to get it in.. but oh my god i felt like a virgin!! and it hurt.. and and and.. two thoughts kept running through my head 1) if this is what Sir wishes then it is His to take.. and 2) i am broken..

Eventually Sir stopped .. i was going to say gave up... but Sir rarely if ever gives up!! and the tears welled up in my eyes and i said "It is broken!!" and a tiny sob broke from my lips.. broken.. me who could wear Sir out.. broken??!! Sir whispered in my ear "you are NOT broken!! trust me!" And i do...... trust Him... so maybe just a little broken??? maybe this weekend it will all be fixed again.... i have my fingers crossed..

topsy turvy world

It has been a topsy turvy crazy week - between birthing grandbabies.. work.. visiting new grandbabies.. work... cuddling my BIG grandson who misses mommy and daddy.. and work.. i don't even know what day it is!!

i did manage to get blogger working again.. it wasn't blogger.. it was IE.. i somehow or other managed to corrupt a file or two.. don't ask me how.. don't ask me why......it probably has to do with this topsy turvy world......i totally gave up trying to fix it and just downloaded a new browser...

This weekend Sir and i are off to our nation's capital for a private play party.. ask me if i am excited!!! i desperately need some normalcy back in my life.. it feels like a life time since i last knelt at Sir's feet... i am ready to pack.. load the car and disappear into the wild blue yonder for 24 hours.. get my endophin fix.. get my Sir fix.. and turn my world back around and set it on its axis again...

Hopefully by the end of the weekend my brain will be back on its axis.. and the words will once again flow freely from my fingers to the screen........ for now.. i am just holding on to the edge of this topsy turvy world...........

Pins and needles..

A while back.. when my favourite Aunt died and Sir and i were cleaning out her apartment.. Sir came across this pin cushion she must have used .. maybe even her mother before her.. for sewing chores. Sir tucked the little pin cushion into a box.. and it reappeared in our playroom - proudly displayed on a shelf. The joke was - at the time - Sir and i were not into needle play.



Now as i reported earlier.. i fashioned a tack bra this weekend.. which i proudly wore .. and which left me a wee bit disappointed. It felt as though all 50 tacks were imbedded in my breasts.. and i half expected to see rivulets of blood dripping down my tits when i removed it.. only to be disappointed.

Sir, reading of my disappointment, decided Sunday evening to inbed my ass with needles. And to raise the bar a wee bit higher.. He placed the needles low and close together.. leaving lots of room above them to whip my ass. (He still refuses to tell me what exactly it was He did use to whip.. but my god.. either it was a new wicked toy.. or the needles had nicely sensitized my ass so that each hit burned and tore at that skin)



When Sir decided it was time to remove the needles.. there was no gentle turn and pull. Nooo Siree bob.. not this time...this time Sir just yanked them out.. (and if you look closely at the above picture - you will see that the needles were all the way in.. wayyyyyyy in!!) Funny thing was though.. it didn't hurt as much as i would have thought considering He was yanking them out.. and probably not as much as it hurts when He gently removes them... What did happen though was yanking caused little riveluts of blood to run down my ass...



colour me one happy subbie...

Tack Bra

Despite all sorts of road blocks being thrown up .. like my having somehow screwed up blogspot so badly i have lost just about all the function keys... i did manage to not only make the tack bra but get some pictures of it uploaded as well.

The making of the bra was not nearly as difficult as i had originally thought (ok ok planned it to be!!) Sir took me shopping to a second hand clothing store yesterday to buy 2 bras - as per kaya's directions.. and then to get some tacks.. and home again.

Now for those of you who worry about my health.. and sanity.. when approaching some of these projects.. i DID wash the bras well in good hot water.. (god only knows where they were before they were mine!!) and i did disinfect the tacks.... all before assembling.

i assembled it this morning and got all weak kneed thinking about the tiny pin prick holes that were gonna be created.. tiny rivulets of blood trickling down the whiteness of my breasts...

i put the bra on with Sir manning the camera waiting for just the right gasp of shock (He did manage to get one) but for the most part it wasn't nearly as bad as i had projected in my imagination. i wore it for about an hour and then asked for permission to remove it.. granted of course. i gingerly ... slowly .. removed the bra to find...
NOTHING... not one drop of blood.. not one puncture hole... sighhhhh.. just some cute lil dimples. Now i think i may understand why kaya moved on to upholstery nails.......... but whether i am ready for that just yet i am not sure............but for now.. the tack bra is done..

and i am wondering .... magadala.. did you get to play with chopsticks??
kaya .. did you get any pretty lil crafty plastic clothes pegs??

S.O.S

i went to read some blogs this morning... ok ok i admit it i haven't read these blogs in a couple of weeks so maybe an announcement was made.. BUT Life as His.. annissa's blog is gone???? no goodbyes?? just pack up and disappear into the night????

would someone tell her i miss her writings???