"The Difference a Day Makes"

Almost a week ago I wrote how excited I was - we were going to have a mini holiday this past weekend.......... and that I was getting excited for Christmas.  Everything seemed to be falling into place... everyone seemed happy ........

And then it all kinda fell apart........... 

Oh the time W and I spent together in the hotel was amazing........ W got to go to his flight club and pop in on his train club (well ex-train club) and go to all his hobbie shops...... I spent quiet time in the hotel just vegging..........

And then we went to grandson's birthday party.......... It should have run like clock work.. it should have been easy peasy .. drop in .. have coffee and cake - watch the birthday boy open his presents and get on the road back home........ 

Only that isn't what happened..... extended family happened.  I felt myself getting pissed off ............ and as soon as we could escape we did............ However W was angrier than I was over something that happened..... and it all blew up on Sunday,

I had been trying to come up with an alternate plan for Christmas on the way home in the car.... cause logic told me neither W nor I were gonna make it through 48 hours or so of family Christmas............ 

Despite what I dream of.... sparkling Christmas lights... presents wrapped under the tree.. happy smiling kids.. golden brown turkey with all the trimmings - a Rockwell type of Christmas - it never happens... EVER.  Somebody always gets cranky - or sick.  Kids fight.  Adults fight.  It's never as pretty or Christmasy as I dream............

and that realization shook my world.. my fantasy world.  (god why do I insist on trying to live some sort of damn fantasy??!!)  

Anyway - everything blew up.. W isn't talking to my kids and their extended family - my kids aren't talking to him........ and I am sitting smack dab in the middle feeling like I am gonna be sick.

With things the way they are now - there isn't even any hope of a compromise Christmas.  I will NOT have Christmas without W.... W.I.L.L.  N.O.T.... no way no how.

So now I must search for some way to compromise the family Rockwell Christmas fantasy with the reality of two old buggers alone over Christmas.......... 

shrug - at least there won't be any rude extended family - or sick kids .........