At this point in my life I really just want to live a quiet life -- no drama -- little or no stress -- I want to kneel at Sir Steve's feet and be his ...... pleasing to him .... his good lil "keebler elf" as he affectionately calls me.
BUT as I was sitting outside this morning thinking about the weekend ahead -- the week behind me -- I realize the life I dream of probably doesn't exist....
Tomorrow morning Sir Steve and I head off to a hospital in Ottawa where he has to undergo tests on his arms and shoulders -- trying to find the cause of the pain in his arms and the pins and needles in his hands. (Not a good symptom when you own your own renovating company and use your hands and arms daily)
After the tests we head west to meet up with some BDSM friends and go to a munch -- sleep over with said friends and then head off Saturday morning to go and visit my brother and family. We also are going to a football game - Toronto against Montreal (Toronto will win hands down)
Then long drive home on Sunday to pick up the lil one and start the new week.
The weeks all pretty much look the same -- very vanilla -- very 'happy' family. There is rarely a chance during the week for me to 'kneel at Sir Steve's feet'....... or time for some 'loving'.
I honestly think this life I want is nothing but a fantasy -- and that kinda makes me sad.
I don't mean to sound dissatisfied cause I'm not -- because I love this man with my whole being......... and I would go through anything to have even a few minutes of kneeling at his feet.... feeling his hands on my body... hear him whisper "I love you" in the darkness of the night.
Just sometimes I would wish fantasies could come true -- like fairy tales have.