I have been in the lifestyle for over 30 years now I guess...... but it's not so long that I have forgotten how hard it is to take the first steps out into public -- hell when I moved here it was a bit like being a newbie all over again.
I had such wonderful mentors when I first entered the scene - and I promised that I would pay it forward. And I have tried to do just that!
About a week ago I was checking the RSVP's to a munch I go to and I noticed there was a new name. I went and checked her profile and not only is she a newbie to kink - she's a newbie to the area.
So I reached out. I sent her a private message introducing myself - and saying that the munch she was thinking about attending was a fun event - with good people!!
She wrote back - I wrote back - and we landed up - in a very brief time - sharing some good laughs. I think my offer to do deep breathing exercises with her in the parking lot did a lot to break the ice. She thanked me over and over for reaching out to her and actually agreed to meet me before the munch for those deep breathing exercises!
Then this morning I got a message from her. She apologized but said she just couldn't come to the munch. That someone who was deeply entrenched in the group and been "bothering her a lot". I couldn't even message her - she deactivated her account.
NOTHING but nothing makes me as angry as a Top/Dom who smells a newbie and swoops down and swallows them whole. They often times come across as a gentle lamb -- but really they are a wolf in sheep's clothing.
I wish she hadn't gone POOF - I wish she had given me and others like Angel a chance to show her how wonderful this community is... how we would have ALL protected her from the BIG BAD WOLF.
In my opinion - wolves need to be rounded up and removed from the herd.