The above is what I found when I googled 'polyamorous" in google images.
It hasn't been a big secret that in the last few months I have decided poly was the right fit for me. And that I have had 2 active play partners.
BUT neither of these relationships has been public. One I am totally fine with it being discrete - that was all discussed and agreed upon at the very beginning. And I am good with it - there is honesty and expectations and needs clearly covered.
The other was always identified as poly. Yet there was no public acknowledgement of it. And with time I began to feel - rightly or wrongly - like I was living in the shadows. AND it was wearing down my sense of self.
BUT I put the blame on my shoulders - I let things go along status quo. I didn't say I need/want some progression. AND I know that he is/was having his own struggles and I came to understand them - slowly - but still with some confusion.
We have been talking more - which is a good thing.... always a good thing.
Yesterday a slow metamorphosis began......first he acknowledged one partner .......... then a stall and my heart sank ........ and instead of being patient - I jumped the gun - and was told to be patient. I didn't understand....... and was confused and yeah a little bit hurt.........
but then there it was - the public acknowledgement of poly partner. And ya know - it felt an awful lot like walking out of the darkness into the sunshine. No secrets - no pretending - no hiding what is.
In a lot of ways this acknowledgement doesn't change anything - we have always been who we were - but now - I feel he acknowledges me ..... and that is a very good thing!