I had for lack of a better word an "interesting" weekend.
There was a munch on Friday night and a play party on Saturday and Angel slept over ..
And today i am feeling a little sleep deprived....... I say 'sleep deprived' so no one will expect great words of wisdom - or literary brilliance out of me today (grinning)
Friday night was very special......... and was one of those visits with friends that remind me how lucky I am. I always stay overnight with these friends - and yes sometimes in the past we have played after the munch - but recently we haven't played - or I haven't gone to the munch. I felt they were there for me when I needed them the most - when my collar had been removed - and when I was suffering through some pretty negative self talk - and hurting more than I thought possible for one person.
Friday afternoon when I arrived I had no expectations - just 3 friends visiting and catching up after a long dry spell. BUT there is a magic in their house - something they work very hard to create. A calmness -- a happy place. I know from the past that they dry tears and listen better than almost anyone I know - and they are very good at stopping negative self talk.
BUT I had none of that when I arrived - so there was much laughter and conversation - and being the wee bit of a brat I am - when we were discussing where my life is now - I said I was doing well - had a "Daddy Dom " to play with occasionally - and The Sadist to give me much needed pain........
And then I stopped
got that cheeky grin I have
and said "I am making a list of needs I have - and filling in names beside those needs
The only spot I can't seem to fill is someone to do knife play. We all laughed and nothing more was really said..........
after the munch - after the coffee company left - the three of us were sitting quietly in the living room and I was thinking it was probably time for me to head off to bed when HE left the room and returned carrying a knife. He sat back in his chair and I couldn't take my eyes off the knife.
My knees had gone weak ...... my heart was pounding........ and my mouth was dry.
He 'barked' strip and sit - pointing to the floor in front of his chair. I slipped off my sweater and bra and sat............ immediately his hand went around my neck forcing my head back - me feeling the coolness of the blade against my skin - felt the tip starting slowly to trace a pattern down my jugular to my collar bone and back up......
He pushed my head forward - so far that I was bent in half - and the knife traced sharp patterns up and down my back - making sure it played in all the sensuous spots - making my body tremble spots - making me moan out loud spots.
My head was pulled back up tucked under his arm - in a head lock position - chest and body openly displayed - available - to the knife. At one point the knife was running over my leather pants - tickling my inner thigh - making me pant and want so much more... I struggled out of the head lock and looked up at him and said in a whisper with a cheeky grin "TEASE!" and he shook his head and said "then off with them!" and they were gone......... and then the play became even more intense ........
I wrote a short "Moment in Time" piece over on Fetlife on Saturday.
Your hand is wrapped around my neck tilting my head backwards - I feel the cold steel of the blade against my throat.......
I hold my breath -- though the moans escape through my lips.....
Then slowly the blade slides down my neck.. over my collar bone sliding to the right - playing, tickling my nipple ...... feeling your hand roughly grabbing and lifting - feeling the blade pressing against the tender skin under my breast ... feeling the bite of the cold steel against burning skin .......
feeling the blade cutting across my chest - feeling the left side abused so beautifully .....
my muscles twitch and beads of sweat roll slowly down my belly ..... the knife traces them - chases them???
And then -- then hips thrust upwards - kissing the tip of the knife - blackness swirling around - hearing the growl - is it his or mine??
There has never been any real negotiations with this couple - and after care involved my feeling that so much more needed to be said - to be clarified. He admitted that they were probably the worst example of how to negotiate - and it needs to be done!!
So that the next time (and there WILL be a next time) might be even more fun - even more 'satisfying' all round.
And then I was tucked into bed - kissed on the forehead - and told to have sweet dreams.