Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Out of Practice
I have been feeling like I am out of practice - maybe W feels out of practice too I honestly don't know....
I feel like I have forgotten how to be a submissive -
I feel like I have forgotten spankings
I feel like I have forgotten orgasms
I feel like I have forgotten the total surrender that comes from the above...
This morning - being the brat I can be - I wiped my soaking wet hands on W's face - saying - oh so very sweetly - "I love my Sir". He turned around with that look....... THAT look - opened the utensil drawer - found the BIG spoon - turned me around - pulled up my nightie and whalloped my ass until I was doing the subbie jig - crying out - complaining - and laughing - saying " I had forgotten how much it hurts!! I am out of practice!!"
I went on Fetlife - and saw a picture of myself - sitting in the backyard under my red umbrella - and I was flashing W..... he had taken a pic and posted it on FL. When I saw it - I felt my face go red - and redder still when I read the comments - especially when i read Dr Suck's comment "I know those!!" and all the memories of naked days at camp came flooding back.
I am out of practice .......... totally............. it has been almost 5 months of detouring and I am ready to find my way back to the Journey we had planned....... more than ready.
Tomorrow I see the urologist - I get the pathology report - and I hope I get an ok to return to a more normal life............. (even if that normal life involves chemo - or some such follow up) I NEED my normal life - NOW
But first I think I need some practice,