Thursday, July 09, 2009

The Great Garden Adventure

Welllllllll the sun came out this morning...

The electric hedge clipper which i borrowed from Sir was calling my name.. so were the damn hedges that were threatening to eat up the front yard and the front steps...

So.. clever me... i put on my red hoody, shorts and yellow duckies and went out to tackle the man eating hedges......

Now you should know i did not plant this massive hedge - modge podge of bushes actually - everything from a wild rose bush to god only knows what others.. and they have grown to a full height of at least 6 feet !!! buried under their massive branches is a lovely lil wooden farm fence ....... that i want to see.........

This modge podge of a hedge has been a bit of a sore point between myself and the townhouse association....... i claim they should trim it as i didn't plant it.. they claim they didn't plant it therefore i must trim it..

Some summers the garden guys will trim the modge podge hedge.. other years they won't even look at it..

This summer they made a first half assed attempt at trimming it down to managable heights...... but stopped mid way through........ i thought.. 'lazy guys couldn't even finish the job'

So that brings me to this morning and the electric hedge clipper... and the daunting task of bringing the modge podge hedge down a few feet.

Out i went all decked out... and started in.. i didn't care how it got done .. how neat it looked i only cared to bring it down........ down i say....

i worked my way from left to right.. the right hand bush being the highest and most daunting..

Finally i got to it.. the gigantic thick bush on the right...and started in ......... i noticed a few flying creatures come out of the bush at first pass.. but didn't think much of it as .. hey.. they were probably just flies curled up in the shade right??

So i continued.. and then more flying creatures came swarming out.. and me?? well i am standing there holding the electric hedge clippers squinting through the sun's rays trying to identify what in god's name is swarming out of the bush.........

Can't tell........ so do what any half assed nit wit would do..... i go and get a bug spray from the house and proceed to spray the bush to death.. inside outside upside down side..

The bush is now dripping wet.. the flying creatures have disappeared into the sun's bright rays....

i wait a few seconds for everything to dry out... cause i am thinking.. 'should i be using an electric hedge clipper on a wet bush' .. yup that's all that was worrying me when i picked up the hedge clipper and started in on the bush again.........



This time........... i got swarmed.. just like in any movie you might see.. just like in your worst nightmares.. swarmed..........

i dropped the hedge clipper and i am swatting and waving my arms around like a mad woman.. i am sure the roofers on the building beside me must have wondered what the mad woman in red was doing...........

As i am swatting and waving my arms - which is sorta working but not all that well.. i decided to beat a hasty retreat to the house....

i have taken a look in the mirror... i have two stings on my face.. and umpteen minor ones on my upper body.. thank god for the thick red hoody !!! There is one nasty sting on my upper left arm............ but that's about it..

However i am now suffering from post traumatic swarm syndrome - as i sit here safe and sound in my office... my body is twitching and i am jumping swearing i can feel those beasts all over my body still..............

i think i now know why the garden guys did a half assed job of trimming the modge podge hedge... i think they may have been greeted by my bush creatures..........

Now i think it is time to move around back.. and curl up safe and sound under my big red umbrella in my secret garden and read......... and leave the flying creatures to nest happily in the big bush on the right side...

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A late in the day update.........

The nice thing.. really nice thing..... about living in a condo is that when you have a problem you pick up the phone and call the "office"........ which is exactly what i did after this morning's lil garden adventure.

They called a Bug Man..... is he called an exterminator?? ... to come and take a look... He told me i have a huge nest of black jackets... and that they bite as well as sting and they never lose their stingers so they can keep stinging you over and over and over again...... and .. the sting gives off some sort of scent to the other black jackets so they can find you...... how nice !!! (NOT)

Anyway .. the long and short of it is ... i have one bad bite / sting?? on my arm and the rest have disappeared... and the Bug Man will be back either tomorrow or Monday in his bug costume (god i hope i am home i so want to get pictures!!!) and will rid my modge podge hedge of it's nest.

Until then ... i will remain under my red umbrella in my secret garden.........

And if you are curious to see what one of these "black jackets" look like.. let me show you............



Big buggers aren't they??

5 comments:

swan said...

Oh!
I hope you are alright... not allergic to bee stings? If this isn't a serious health threat, then by all means, retire to the garden and stay put.

hugs, swan

Blade said...

How horrible for you! I hope you feel better soon.

Are the bushes awful? Maybe you could find a spray to just kill the bushes altogether and then you can plant something you like in their place.

Buffalo said...

1) What is a modge podge hedge?

2) Stung, huh? Good thing you're into needle play, eh?

Hisflower said...

aww sweetie! im so sorry to hear about those nasty bees! i was working outside a couple weeks ago.. i didnt get stung, but i caught either poison ivy, oak or sumac- no one can tell me exactly..but its still covering my arms and legs....doesnt make for a pretty looking 'flower' at all...lol.
be careful out there and i hope you get a pic of the bug man in his suit!
hugs,
Hisflower

anna said...

LOL @ Buffalo's comment!

Sounds like you handled the swarming much better than I would have. I think I'd have been screaming like a child. I don't do so well with flying creatures.

I'm glad you came away with very few stings/bites. It must have been frightening.