Thursday, September 13, 2007

Newbies and such

i have been working far too hard this week...... and totally losing touch with everything sane.... (ok ok some may not call this lifestyle sane...... but in my mad mad world this is as sane as it gets!!) It was so crazy at work today that mid morning i called Sir (probably scared the hell out Him too as i NEVER call from work) .. He wanted to know what was wrong...... i said "nothing....... i just really needed to hear a voice from the great wide world outside the four walls here"........ made perfect sense to me.. but probably not a whole lot of sense to Sir.

At lunch time, i took myself out to my car for a smoke and a quiet session with some classical music........ i put the back of the seat down .. closed my eyes and just enjoyed the music filling the car. A noise made me open my eyes and i saw a grey car go whipping round the corner past my parked car. A few seconds later i opened my eyes to see - in the rear view mirror - Sir's car parked behind me and Sir walking towards me. i couldn't help but smile........ i was fine.. and yet here He was making bloody sure i was fine. He took me out to lunch and restored some sanity to my fried brain.

Then tonight when i got home i decided that i was going to have a nice long rest cuddled under my blanket..... and then i was gonna catch up on some reading of blogs...... find some more sanity.

And it was with some interest i read an excellent post on dealing with newbies.... from A View from the Floor........ It started with this quote....
"To say nothing of the times when the Dominant/Top enjoys pushing limits, at the expense of their submissive/slave/bottom who simply endured the experience."
if you wish to read the entire blog entry click HERE...

It made me remember a time when i was very actively involved in the BDSM community here in the Great White North....... and how i have drifted away. i said in my comment on the View... '
so now i sit on the side lines and mostly listen .. and nod like some old granny.. and let them all talk themselves out and find their own way..... '

it isn't a bad place on the side lines you know.... i realized a while back .. i really don't want the responsibility of "preaching" or "teaching" what is right or wrong in this lifestyle..... mostly now i would just talk about acceptance .. and tolerance. And that is boring when you are caught up in the frenzy of finding something new and exciting.....

i look at where Sir and i are now....... and think i have nothing... absolutely nothing... to offer to a newbie.....What Sir and i do .. the level we play at...... is so far removed from where a newbie should be starting....... as carrie ann said on the View....... newbies have to find out their limits before they can be pushed.........

And what all that has to do with Sir coming out and restoring some sanity to my fried brain i haven't a clue.......... it's just one of those "follow the bouncing subbie ball " nights.........

2 comments:

Jessica said...

Just wanted to send you some cyber hugs... Haven't seen you in a while and I WAS looking forward to seeing you in Sept, but I guess it will be in November... it's so faaaaaarrrrr away...

Buffalo said...

Restoring your sanity may well be a task too great for anyone. I'm thinkin' the age of miracles is over.