Thursday, July 26, 2007

Reflections



"It's the submissives that show to others what type of Dom owns them." – Anonymous



That quote this morning got me thinking..... it ties in to my post about gracious slavery. (well i think it does!! and again it is my blog so go with the bouncing ball !!)

If we as submissives are proud of who and what we are AND proud of who owns us we should be a living example of it.

A goodly amount of time (recently) i have not been a shining example of who my Sir trained me to be... Sometimes i do not serve Him without a grumble or whine or small stamp of my foot... Sometimes i want to nudge Him (ok ok maybe shake Him is more the truth) and get him to see me sitting invisible in that corner.. Sometimes i shake my head "NO" when He wishes to clamp my nipples or my pussy.. or anything that doesn't quite fit into my plan for the day... Sometimes i am less than a gracious slave at public events... letting my own private frustrations at the general tone of the community colour my participation at the events.... Sometimes it would seem i have lost touch with my goals.

i was reminded of lessons learned at my father's knee...... learning to "sit like a lady.. walk like a lady".. social graces.. never do a half assed job - ALWAYS do the best you can.. always BE the best you can be.. please thank you.. and on and on........ The lessons Sir taught me aren't all that different..... only now i do those things with him in mind.. be it at work.. shopping... cleaning the house.. i should be doing them all with him in mind.. His pleasures.. His comforts.. His pride..... taking the me out of the equation.

i should be a positive reflection of the man who owns me. Perhaps i have become too self indulgent.. been too indulged... my figurative leash has become too loose....... i need to focus on Sir and a whole lot less on "me".......so that when the "world" sees me they see the wonderful man who owns me.


4 comments:

Buffalo said...

No disrespect intended toward anyone in any lifestyle, I'm thinking folk often mistake an ant hill for Mt. Everest.

Anonymous said...

I'm curious if this is something in you that has changed recently. This right here: "A goodly amount of time (recently) i have not been a shining example of who my Sir trained me to be... Sometimes i do not serve Him without a grumble or whine or small stamp of my foot... Sometimes i want to nudge Him (ok ok maybe shake Him is more the truth) and get him to see me sitting invisible in that corner.. Sometimes i shake my head "NO" when He wishes to clamp my nipples or my pussy.. or anything that doesn't quite fit into my plan for the day... Sometimes i am less than a gracious slave at public events... letting my own private frustrations at the general tone of the community colour my participation at the events.... Sometimes it would seem i have lost touch with my goals."

The idea of being gracious (I've decided) is not for me. I'm not and I won't ever be, when I'm left longing for what I need. And what I've also decided is that Master knew everything about me before He took me as His. He knew I had an intense need for all things dark and scary. He knew that He would have to provide it, or that I would fall off the wagon of graciousness. So, it seems (to me, in all of my wisdom) that if He is not providing it as is His choice, then He should not be surprised at my angst, nor should I be ashamed of doing exactly what He knew I would do.

Make sense?

Maybe we are, in all of our ungraciousness, the perfect reflection of what They are not giving us. And maybe that's not our "shame" to carry.

Or maybe I'm simply trying to rationalize my own craziness. :D

kaya

M:e said...

oooohh wonderful posting, and given extra food for thought by kaya's comment. There are things I can agree with in both.

I am a switch, M's slave, and A's Mistress. As M's slave, I try to keep most of my focus on him, at being what he wants me to be and yes, that includes being gracious, as much as I can. I expect the same from A.

That is easier to do if we feel the one who owns us also remains focussed, and hasn't taken their eye off the ball of what they're trying to achieve. Sometimes, while it might appear to us that is what's happened, it may be deliberate, at other times, focus genuinely has been lost...we can all become a little distracted sometimes.

So, while I agree we should be a reflection of those who own us... I would probably change that to a 'true' reflection. If that's positive, then we will more naturally reflect that postivity. If its not, then sometimes the mirrors need to look to look to the reasons every bit as much as the reflections.

love and hugs xxx

swan said...

I'm late again, of course. I would say, "in a perfect world..." But of course, the world is not perfect, and neither are any of us, and neither are any of Them... We try, and sometimes fail and sometimes succeed. We learn and grow and keep on being who we are in good and not so good.

swan