Wednesday, June 21, 2006

quiet submission

i was looking through some pictures this morning - to post to the photojournal (and yes i HAVE posted to my photojournal) and i started to think about how sometimes being submissive just means being quiet.

i know i am heading into a quiet stage.. probably because of the confusion and noise and hyperactivity i am living through this week... (oh hell that i have been living through this past month!!!) i want nothing more than to curl up quietly at my Sir's feet and meditate on the quietness... i find my focus/my center as much in the quiet moments as in the moments hanging from the chains ......... maybe more so.

But i was also thinking of the quiet boiling lust that always bubbles just below the surface.. even in my most quiet moments. It is not just a lust for sex.. it is a lust for pain.. for serving.. for just plain living.......... a lust for life! my choice of life .......

kaya was talking in her latest blog about "snap and point" how she has struggled with hand signals making her feel like her Master's dog. And i smiled - because one of the first things Sir taught me was to respond to hand signals... "come" "sit" "fetch" .. i don't always "get" them .. sometimes my mind is whirling away and i miss the subtle signal...but in my quiet times.. when i am centered .. the quiet hand signals stroke my soul and help me stay centered/focused.

i know a lot of submissives/slaves are on voice restrictions (now that can mean many different things .. depending on the relationship... depending on the couple) but for me it would mean that i would be quiet.. speaking only when it is absolutely necessary.. and then only softly.. words barely causing a ripple in the air... even in a session .. i would want to be gagged tightly so that i wouldn't make a sound...... wouldn't disturb the quiet stillness of the air.. of the mood......... hearing just the whoop and swish and crack of the toys....

quiet submission - i am ready for some of that .......... i am ready for some quiet centered stillness in my life............

3 comments:

RAheretic's swan said...

This is good. These are visions that clarify. We sometimes forget, in the heat of the other stuff, that there is this, too... The quiet and sinking down deep in the sure certainty of being held secure. Wishing for you that quiet place for a time, now...

swan

His Mija said...

i feel my quiet stage coming on too. where i don't talk to many and i just sew and work on my designs. When i go through those times i don't even talk to Sir much. Not because i'm mad. i just go through inner reflection times.

BIG HUGS

Anonymous said...

I'm quietly searching for chipsticks. *grin*

I haven't forgotten about it. You know how life is. Maybe this weekend (though we only have 6 sets so it seems you might win by default *for now*. We WILL go shopping.)

*hugs* honey

~kaya